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Old 01-30-2009, 06:53 PM   #11
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Re: Should my DD start school??

Just something to keep in mind:

While the mandatory age for attendance (varies state to state) may be 7 or whatever, once they have started their education become mandatory. So you can't pull them out once they have started like a pp mentioned.

I don't have any school age children but in my school district the cutoff was May 31st and since I had an April birthday, I was one of the youngest in my class and while I could keep up, I always hated being the youngest and the last to do everything so I would keep her home another year so that you can be sure that she is ready.

BTW: I love the idea of pre-K like some mentioned earlier. It sounds like a great compromise.



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Old 01-30-2009, 07:01 PM   #12
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Re: Should my DD start school??

I've really struggled with this issue. My daughter will turn 5 in September and she will start kindergarten this year. I know TONS of people who have had the opposite experience, but I was always the oldest in my class and I hated it. I was often bored and didn't try my hardest. I have struggled with my daughter because I want to do what is best for HER, not what would have been best for me. She had preschool last year and this year, and after talking about it a lot with my husband and her teacher, we all think she is ready to start kindergarten. I really don't think that is the right decision for every kid. I don't think there is a *right* thing to do, because kids are all different in what intimidates them, what motivates them, etc. I think what really helped me make my decision is that I would have a much easier time if I wanted to hold her back than if I wanted to skip her ahead a grade.

Good luck with your decision. I'm so glad my other 2 were born in the earlier months of the year!
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Old 01-30-2009, 07:53 PM   #13
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Re: Should my DD start school??

Unless you have concerns about her abilities to keep up - I would send her. If she were a boy I may consider waiting, since everything I've read says there is a much stronger benefit for boys - but making her wait a year for no other reason than you don't want to let go, may not prove a benefit to her if she is ready now. You don't want her to be forever bored with school work because she has already learned everything at home/pre-k/preschool. Then again DS is only 7 months old so I am years from making the decision myself!
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Old 01-30-2009, 07:58 PM   #14
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Re: Should my DD start school??

Both my girls are September born. The cut-off here in CA is Dec 2, which to me is way too young. I sent my first on time and am 99% I'll send my second. They both turned or will turn 5 a few weeks after school start (Kindergarten).
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Old 01-30-2009, 08:14 PM   #15
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Re: Should my DD start school??

Really depends on your one here knows her so we don't know what will work for her. In California they have people who do readiness testing which is a pretty good indicator. I think readiness is more about maturity than academics. My twins and my nephew are 6 weeks apart. They all went to preschool. Me and my SIL struggled with putting them in. We did (Sept. and Nov. b-days with a cut-off date of Dec. 2nd). The twins who are very good in social settings did very well and continue to do well in 1st grade this year. My nephew who isn't so well behaved and doesn't interact with other well was recommended to be held back. My SIL chose to send him ahead and he is still having issues.

Birthday isn't even 90% of what determines if a kid is ready.
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Old 01-30-2009, 08:30 PM   #16
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Re: Should my DD start school??

Originally Posted by Drearina View Post
Studies have show the closer to 6 a child starts school the better they do. Students that start around 5 or younger wind up having troubles around the 3rd grade. I'd wait.

Studies have also shown that it really doesn't matter in the long run

BUT if your child hasn't been in preschool, I would wait. If she has and is board, I would move on. IT depends on the child
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Old 01-30-2009, 08:36 PM   #17
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Re: Should my DD start school??

I think it depends on the child. Usually it isn't a problem right away, though some children may not be mature enough to handle it (Kearnan has a little boy in his class who just made the cut off and he is really struggling, he should have been kept home another year or in preK). So if you don't feel like she would be mature enough to handle it then another year of preK would probably be better. However if you feel like she is mature enough it might be fine. However everyone I have spoken to have told me that as they age these younger kids have trouble. THey are always the youngest in their class. The last to get their driver's license, the last to turn 18, and frequently even their peers tend to look at them like younger siblings instead of equals. Which can be debilitating socially. However again, if you feel like your daughter is mature and ready, having a birthday in early August isn't super young. AS you said, the cutoff is October so there is a chance there will be even younger kids.

Kearnan was supposed to go into 1st this year. It woudl have been his first year of school. His birthday is August 4th, well before our late Sept school cut off. However, I felt like for him being the youngest by close to a year would be worse than being the oldest by a few months (if he went in to second grade many of the kids would be turning 8 within the first few months of school starting, I thought it was better to start 1st at 7yrs and part of a month with the other kids turning 7 in a month or twos time). However because of some failures on the schools part when it wsa time to do his evaluations he didn't have the aid and adaptive technology in place (he has special needs) so he tested poorly and he wound up in K. It is working pretty well really, he enjoys it and because he does have social difficulties in some ways K is good for him. However the chaos of the K classroom and the fact that it doesn't challenge him intelectually is starting to show. He is having behavioral problems outside the realm of normal for him. And it is because he is overstimulated by the noise and activity that wouldnt' be present in the 1st grade classroom. Luckily it is a charter school and very small so he is able to move around at his own pace and at his needs. So he can move up to 1st for part of the day to ease his boredom and fill his desires for structure and still get more socialization help in the K room. But that is a whole other topic I think. Anyway that is what we did, but Kearnan is a diffrent case because he is special needs.

My nephew turned 5 just before our school cutoff, but his mother and father decided to keep him out for one more year. He is quite immature for his age so in that way it was probably good. However I think the babysitter they use coddles the kids too much and I think maybe getting him away from her would have been beneficial. He will have a hard time adjusting to K, so maybe doing it sooner might have been better. But that is what they decided to do.
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Old 01-30-2009, 11:21 PM   #18
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Re: Should my DD start school??

Is it half day K? That would make a difference to me.

You could always homeschool for K but find a couple fun activities for her to be involved in, and then next year decide if you think she's ready for 1st or if you'd rather have her in K.
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Old 01-31-2009, 12:10 AM   #19
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Re: Should my DD start school??

I have a really good friend in the same situation. Her dd is no where near ready to start any type of school but she is having her go anyway. She feels like it is best for everyone (including herself)involved. I, however, do not. A lot rides on your daughter's temperament and maturity level. In the end, it's up to you, but for now, my vote is for waiting and having fun being a little girl for a while longer.
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Old 01-31-2009, 09:04 AM   #20
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Re: Should my DD start school??

When I was teaching kindergarten, we suggested parents look to a triangle with equal emphasis on each corner to determine whether their child was ready. The 3 corners were; academic, development (fine motor skills/gross motor skills), and social maturity.
I've never heard a parent say they wished they would have sent their child a year early, but have heard many parents say they were glad they waited a year. To be fair though- most of those parents were parents of little boys.
If your instincts say your daughter isn't ready, I would totally second the suggestion of finding a pre-K program!
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