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Old 02-05-2009, 08:15 AM   #1
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DS's OT wants us to wean...

..and I don't think DS is ready and I know I'm not

Background: DS was having a hard time transitioning to solid foods so we started seeing an occupational therapist about 3 weeks ago. So far he has been making good progress, but she wants him to start taking breastmilk in a sippy cup, and he refuses. He makes a face like it tastes bad and will throw the cup. He still nurses 4-5 times a day, although we are working on getting that down to 3-4 since 1-2 of the feedings he isn't really taking any milk.

UGH! I don't know how to feel about this. She thinks it will kind of force him to accept the solid foods, but I just don't think hes ready. He still nurses A LOT at night and has been getting more clingy at night since we have started the OT (wants me to be right there touching him all the time....wakes easily when I try to leave...starts nursing almost non-stop from about 4-6am)

I just don't know what to do

ETA: he is almost 15 months and he weighs 27lbs

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Old 02-05-2009, 08:22 AM   #2
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Re: DS's OT wants us to wean...

Awww hun... My lil boy is almost 2 (in april) and we are just getting to the point where he is starting to nurse less and less. Im down to one time each night. I hate that I did this lol but it works for us... I bought him a "binkie" (pacifier) and it helps him sooth himself instead of needing me to sooth him. But we just got him into a crib like 2 weeks ago... bought him Elmo bedding his fav. character ever! and made it seem like he was the coolest ever to have his own special bed. He now loves it and feels confident to sleep alone. He wakes at least once a night but hopefully soon that will end. But he didnt eat solid foods or meals until he was about 18months, he would literally nurse all day running around signing for milk (boob juice is what we call it lol) but he wouldnt talk b/c we taught him to sign and he wouldnt eat REAL food b/c it was convinient for him to nurse whenever he wanted it. He is almost 2 and only 22lbs. His Dr. says he is very small....=/ But stay strong things take time and you know your son better than anyone so dont let anyone push you to do something that you or your son arent ready or comfortable doing. Good Luck! Hope things get easier for you.
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Old 02-05-2009, 08:45 AM   #3
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Re: DS's OT wants us to wean...

I think thats crazy.

thanks but no thanks to the OT IMO . . .. does he have any weight or health problems? or any reason he really needs solids? if you don't want to wean and you and he are not ready this will only cause more problems..
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Old 02-05-2009, 08:55 AM   #4
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Re: DS's OT wants us to wean...

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I think thats crazy.

thanks but no thanks to the OT IMO . . .. does he have any weight or health problems? or any reason he really needs solids? if you don't want to wean and you and he are not ready this will only cause more problems..
Nope, no weight or health problems. Yes, I am worried this will cause unnecessary issues
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Old 02-05-2009, 07:32 PM   #5
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Re: DS's OT wants us to wean...

I think the OT is crazy too. I am not ready to wean my 19lb 10oz 17 month old and she's not ready either but I read How Weaning Happens and Mothering Your Nursing Toddler lately and it helped me understand that babies wean when their need to bf is fulfilled. I don't think weaning will help with solids at all.
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Old 02-05-2009, 07:33 PM   #6
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Re: DS's OT wants us to wean...

I also wanted to add that the clinging and non stop nursing at 4-6am sounds perfectly normal to me.
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Old 02-05-2009, 07:59 PM   #7
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Re: DS's OT wants us to wean...

My son is almost 15months as well, and he weighs 24lbs. Nurses when he is hurt, bored, or jus wants a snack...and of course all throughout the night. But if anyone [like a doctor] told me to wean him, id say "The check is in the mail, ill need a copy of his records for his new doctor, thank you and good bye"
In order for your son to thrive, you need to be on the same page with his providers whether it be the OT, pedi, or jus grandma. Your sons well-being is more important than the OTs "professional" opinion, so i really hope you can find a new OT, if you feel he still needs one.
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Old 02-07-2009, 07:54 PM   #8
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Re: DS's OT wants us to wean...

Wow that is pretty awful of the OT to tell you that. What makes him/her an expert??? What is the big deal about your son not wanting solid food or sippy cups? It isn't a developmental milestone, and I can assure you that your son will get it before he starts college. :P

I'm pretty sure I've read that babies can thrive on nothing but BM for the first TWO years of life (WHO, maybe??) and often do in other countries.

What sippy cups have you tried? I'd keep offering them and some simple foods w/o pressuring him or getting anxious yourself. It sounds like your son is already reacting to the new person in his life by clinging to you more (my dd does the same thing!!!)

Hopefully, I'm not sounding as obnoxious as the know-it-all OT hehe.

Good luck no matter what you decide to do!!!
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Old 02-07-2009, 08:24 PM   #9
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Re: DS's OT wants us to wean...

Thanks for the support, Karrie! We have 6 different brands of sippy cups and he takes water in them all fine....he just won't take breastmilk in them (why get it from the cup when you can have it straight from the source )

DS is starting to make some good progress with food. He has only gagged once in the last 10 days when he used to gag at every feeding often more than once My DH wants us to stop going to the OT, but I can see that the tips she has given me are helping.

The other thing that really bothered me about the last appointment was that she insisted that I put him in the high chair, and he would not stop screaming. He always eats in the high chair at home, but he didn't like being restricted in the high chair with her so close to him.....he is really shy and doesn't like to feel trapped near a stranger. He was screaming and I kept asking if we could just take him out cause he obviously wasn't going to eat if he was screaming, and she said "I think its really important for him to learn that he can't just scream to get his way. He needs to adjust to new situations and learn that this is ok. If you always pick him up when he cries he is never going to adjust to new social situations" I was really upset with this. First of all he had already been in 3 "new social situations" last week and this was the forth, and he didn't have any problems with the other ones. Second, I felt like this is a parenting issue and if I choose to comfort him when he cries that is MY CHOICE as a parent, and I don't think it was her choice to let him scream in the chair.

OK, wow, I guess I just needed to get that out....phew deep breath needed
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Old 02-07-2009, 09:14 PM   #10
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Re: DS's OT wants us to wean...

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Originally Posted by ~LiLaC~ View Post
Thanks for the support, Karrie! We have 6 different brands of sippy cups and he takes water in them all fine....he just won't take breastmilk in them (why get it from the cup when you can have it straight from the source )
haha clever little guy, isn't he? I don't see why he SHOULD take BM in the sippy cup. Maybe I missed something....I don't give my dd BM in a cup. Why go to all that trouble??? She will drink water or cow's milk from a sippy sometimes.

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DS is starting to make some good progress with food. He has only gagged once in the last 10 days when he used to gag at every feeding often more than once My DH wants us to stop going to the OT, but I can see that the tips she has given me are helping.
hmm...my nephew has some gagging issues which get worse when he is around his father (who actually spanked him for vomiting--can you believe that!!!) anyways---he has reflux and has since he was a baby. my sister was pressured to make my nephew eat "real food" but forcing the issue seemed to make it worse (IMHO). who exactly is telling you that your son needs to eat table food?? is there a medical reason? my dd weighs 24lbs. at 14 months so i know your ds is a healthy size! we both have chunky monkeys, after all.

Quote:
The other thing that really bothered me about the last appointment was that she insisted that I put him in the high chair, and he would not stop screaming. He always eats in the high chair at home, but he didn't like being restricted in the high chair with her so close to him.....he is really shy and doesn't like to feel trapped near a stranger. He was screaming and I kept asking if we could just take him out cause he obviously wasn't going to eat if he was screaming, and she said "I think its really important for him to learn that he can't just scream to get his way. He needs to adjust to new situations and learn that this is ok. If you always pick him up when he cries he is never going to adjust to new social situations" I was really upset with this. First of all he had already been in 3 "new social situations" last week and this was the forth, and he didn't have any problems with the other ones. Second, I felt like this is a parenting issue and if I choose to comfort him when he cries that is MY CHOICE as a parent, and I don't think it was her choice to let him scream in the chair.

OK, wow, I guess I just needed to get that out....phew deep breath needed
I think you hit the nail on the head here. It is a parenting choice to comfort your child, and you know him better than anyone else! I have noticed that my dd is BETTER in public when I regularly comfort her. The times I've tried letting her cry (mostly from caving to pressure from other people) she is more anxious and upset in public.

Believe me when I say I can relate. My son was very shy and uncomfortable in new situations until he was about 4 years old. He used to lay on his napmat at Mother's Day Out for about 15 minutes when he first arrived to adjust. As long as the teacher left him alone for that time, he would get up and go play like all the other children. If a substitute tried to force it, he would have a meltdown. NOW, he is a gregarious and friendly child (just TRY getting him to hush hehe).

My daughter started suffering from stranger anxiety at 4 months. She wouldn't even let grandparents touch her or talk to her until she turned a year old. I felt so bad--but that is just the way she is. She needs time to adjust to new situations and people, just like her big brother did.

Okay---sorry for rambling here. I have to agree with your dh about letting that OT go. It seems she has her own ideas about your child and isn't willing to get to know him and care for him the way he needs her to. She might very well cause you more problems than you have now.

At any rate---you gotta do what you think is best, and I support you!!!!
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