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Old 02-10-2009, 02:37 PM   #1
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6 month dd and sleep...

Hello Mamas!
I just wanted to talk a little about dd's sleeping and get some feedback!
My dd is 6 months old and has never slept very well. Also had colic when younger. I have read "no cry sleep solution" and "health sleep habits, happy child".
I am trying to add things from "No cry" book like bedtime routine, schedule, lovey, etc.
So right now she is napping fairly regularly. (usually around 9am, 12pm, and 4 pm) and going to bed by 8pm. The problem is that she wakes up so much! She rarely takes naps longer than 30 min. and usually that is only when she is in the car or being held. If I try to lay her down she wakes up! Also, I have started putting her in her crib to sleep at first (since she sleeps earlier than dh and I) and she usually goes down (eventually) and then only sleeps for 1 1/2 hours tops! Once she wakes up when we are going to bed, she cosleeps with us for the rest of the night. (oh and she pretty much always nurses to sleep too)
I have just been getting to frustrated with trying to put her down! And I feel like I need to stay home to help her get regular naps (she is very distracted by things and doesn't usually sleep at all if there is a lot going on around her) but then I feel like I can't do anything when she sleeps either because I have to just hold her.
I feel horrible for getting frustrated and also for not wanting to hold her all the time! WDYT?
I just found a babyhawk on fsot so that I can wear her while she is napping and maybe that will help.
Would love any feedback! Thanks mamas!

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Old 02-10-2009, 02:45 PM   #2
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Re: 6 month dd and sleep...

I'm right there with you, my DS wakes every 2hrs still he is also 6mos
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Old 02-10-2009, 02:52 PM   #3
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Re: 6 month dd and sleep...

Babywearing and rocking - those are what worked for my son. He really didn't have "sleep issues," but he would always wake up whenever I tried to put him down - naps or bedtime. I finally realized that if I rocked him to sleep and waited until he was "dead to the world," I could put him down and he would stay asleep.

Babywearing for naptime is great too - I couldn't have done anything without our baby carriers. Once he fell asleep in the carrier though, I couldn't put him down without waking. So I just got used to it and didn't worry with it.

Shortly after his 1st birthday, he started transitioning into putting himself to sleep in his crib. We have a very regular routine, for both naps and bedtime: hugs and kisses, I lay him down, give him his pacifier, his baby (koala bear) and his sippy cup. Then I put his blanket on. If he's not super tired, he may play for awhile in there but he always goes to sleep within 10 - 20 minutes - and I don't have to be in the room either!!

I definitely would suggest a routine (something that works for both of you) but know that if your daughter happens to be one who needs the extra cuddle time or rocking, it's no big deal. I remember so many books and people telling me to not get him used to being rocked to sleep, he'd never learn to sleep on his own. Well, I felt that putting in 15 minutes of rocking was the least I could do to make sure he slept through the night (10 - 12 hours once he got to that developmental stage). I had never heard of a college student needing to be rocked, so I figured it would be okay!
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Old 02-10-2009, 03:07 PM   #4
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Re: 6 month dd and sleep...

thanks for the input mamas! it helps to know that i am not the only one!
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Old 02-10-2009, 09:42 PM   #5
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Re: 6 month dd and sleep...

oh good! You mean there is an end in sight? ariatrance - how did you help him make the transition????

ericandash - I could have written your post! and almost did.... except we didn't have colic issues. But dd loves her mei tai and doesn't like to sleep alone. Would much rather I stay so she can suck on me for the whole nap or night!

I sooooo badly want to help her learn to fall asleep well on her own, but it seems like there's so many different views on the best way to go about it that I'm lost! we often nurse to sleep (which I know is controversial) and I used to say, 'whatever, it works for us'. But lately I don't know if it does! I don't want to make her dependent on me! what if I can't be there for a nap - dh can't nurse her!!

I'd love to hear more specifics, thoughts, experiences, etc. on this topic!! TIA!! my dd is also 6mo.
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Old 02-10-2009, 10:38 PM   #6
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Re: 6 month dd and sleep...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sakari View Post
oh good! You mean there is an end in sight? ariatrance - how did you help him make the transition????

ericandash - I could have written your post! and almost did.... except we didn't have colic issues. But dd loves her mei tai and doesn't like to sleep alone. Would much rather I stay so she can suck on me for the whole nap or night!

I sooooo badly want to help her learn to fall asleep well on her own, but it seems like there's so many different views on the best way to go about it that I'm lost! we often nurse to sleep (which I know is controversial) and I used to say, 'whatever, it works for us'. But lately I don't know if it does! I don't want to make her dependent on me! what if I can't be there for a nap - dh can't nurse her!!

I'd love to hear more specifics, thoughts, experiences, etc. on this topic!! TIA!! my dd is also 6mo.
Thanks for sharing! You are not alone! hang in there! Hopefully we can both get some good advice from some mamas on here!

Anyone else have any thoughts, experience or advice?
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Old 02-10-2009, 11:09 PM   #7
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Re: 6 month dd and sleep...

Well, let's see... I'm writing around my 7-m-o, who is perfectly happy to be asleep in my arms (luckily off the breast right now), but would wake either instantly or in 15 minutes if I put her down.... <g> Yep, I'm right there with you.

Part of me says, oh well, she'll grow out of it. The other part is frustrated because now that DD2 is getting more social, it's harder and harder to get her the sleep that I want her to have. If she hears DD1, she wakes up. If DH laughs at an evening TV show, she wakes up. Choir rehearsal Monday nights -- she's apt to cry and not sleep no matter what the babysitter does. It would be better for her if she could sleep in a crib in a different room, without me and my breasts <g>, and it would also give me more time to play with DD1, keep the house in decent shape, etc. So I'm not thrilled with it.

That said, I've only made one serious attempt to train her to accept sleep by herself. It takes too much energy! I expect we'll try again during spring break, when DH will be home more, and if that doesn't work, I just might wait until summer. She's my last baby, so I know I'll miss the cuddling when it stops....
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Old 02-11-2009, 09:00 AM   #8
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Re: 6 month dd and sleep...

Well, I would love to say that it was my perfect parenting that allowed my son to transition to falling asleep on his own.....but that totally doesn't exist!

I think his successful transition was due to a combination of factors: he's a daycare kid and no one there is going to rock a baby to sleep everyday, he was shifting developmentally from baby to toddler and I got pregnant.

Daycare: He has always been great there but has also wanted more "mom" time when he got home (understandable). So what he would willingly do at daycare wasn't going to fly at home - like going to sleep on his own - until he was emotionally/mentally/developmentally ready to (that's my theory and I'm sticking to it! )

Pregnant: as soon as the line turned up on the test, my belly popped out. No joke! As I am petite anyway, there just started to be less and less room for him to be comfortable and that probably helped him to physically transition. I'm not suggesting this as a method of getting your little one to sleep on their own for longer periods of time. Just saying it was probably a factor for us...

I know if I were a SAHM, it would be totally different - cause it just is! I do remember several nights in the beginning of the transition where I just stood over him, rubbing his belly or back, singing softly - just letting him know I was there but it was still night time and he couldn't come out to play/eat/whatever.

There was some crying in the beginning too - I'd stand outside his bedroom door and count before going in to comfort/sooth. It wasn't CIO exactly, more like extending the time of fussy crying so he'd learn that (1) he could self-sooth and (2) mom would always come to him if he got really upset (I tried to go in before it escalated to fully awake, all out cry).

Maybe none of this makes sense or maybe it can give someone a different perspective/different thing to try.
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Old 02-11-2009, 10:13 AM   #9
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Re: 6 month dd and sleep...

The (unsuccessful) trying I did do was unsuccessful because this DD gets hysterical. I'm not willing to let her be heartbroken. I'm all for wail-it-out/fuss-it-out self-soothing -- worked for DD1! -- but not panicky sobs.
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Old 02-11-2009, 10:32 AM   #10
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Re: 6 month dd and sleep...

Quote:
Originally Posted by ariatrance View Post
Babywearing and rocking - those are what worked for my son. He really didn't have "sleep issues," but he would always wake up whenever I tried to put him down - naps or bedtime. I finally realized that if I rocked him to sleep and waited until he was "dead to the world," I could put him down and he would stay asleep.

Babywearing for naptime is great too - I couldn't have done anything without our baby carriers. Once he fell asleep in the carrier though, I couldn't put him down without waking. So I just got used to it and didn't worry with it.

Shortly after his 1st birthday, he started transitioning into putting himself to sleep in his crib. We have a very regular routine, for both naps and bedtime: hugs and kisses, I lay him down, give him his pacifier, his baby (koala bear) and his sippy cup. Then I put his blanket on. If he's not super tired, he may play for awhile in there but he always goes to sleep within 10 - 20 minutes - and I don't have to be in the room either!!

I definitely would suggest a routine (something that works for both of you) but know that if your daughter happens to be one who needs the extra cuddle time or rocking, it's no big deal. I remember so many books and people telling me to not get him used to being rocked to sleep, he'd never learn to sleep on his own. Well, I felt that putting in 15 minutes of rocking was the least I could do to make sure he slept through the night (10 - 12 hours once he got to that developmental stage). I had never heard of a college student needing to be rocked, so I figured it would be okay!
Thanks for all this input! love it! I agree about waiting until the babes are totally "dead to the world" to lay them down. I can usually lay my dd down at night like that, but in the day it doesn't seem to matter how long I wait! I am hoping that wearing her in my babyhawk that is on it's way to us right now will help!
Also, I think it is cute how you said that once you were pregnant your lo just had less room to sleep with you and was ok with sleeping in the crib
I might try some "limited crying" sometime, but just haven't done that yet at all. My dd (like S Starr's) gets so hysterical when she cries that I haven't even wanted to go there! We'll see how it goes though. We might need to do some kind of crying at sometime...

Quote:
Originally Posted by S Starr View Post
Well, let's see... I'm writing around my 7-m-o, who is perfectly happy to be asleep in my arms (luckily off the breast right now), but would wake either instantly or in 15 minutes if I put her down.... <g> Yep, I'm right there with you.

Part of me says, oh well, she'll grow out of it. The other part is frustrated because now that DD2 is getting more social, it's harder and harder to get her the sleep that I want her to have. If she hears DD1, she wakes up. If DH laughs at an evening TV show, she wakes up. Choir rehearsal Monday nights -- she's apt to cry and not sleep no matter what the babysitter does. It would be better for her if she could sleep in a crib in a different room, without me and my breasts <g>, and it would also give me more time to play with DD1, keep the house in decent shape, etc. So I'm not thrilled with it.

That said, I've only made one serious attempt to train her to accept sleep by herself. It takes too much energy! I expect we'll try again during spring break, when DH will be home more, and if that doesn't work, I just might wait until summer. She's my last baby, so I know I'll miss the cuddling when it stops....
S Starr: I am glad that we can relate! Hopefully both of our dd's will learn to sleep better soon! My dd is asleep in my lap right now too! I totally relate with your dd becoming more social and feeling like she is not getting the sleep she needs. Do you wear her in a carrier at all while she naps?
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