Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-18-2009, 12:08 AM   #1
spurmar
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Seattle
Posts: 50
My Mood:
Fighting twin toddlers?

I have identical twin boys that are almost 15 months old. They are fighting constantly and it is driving me crazy! They fight over toys chairs or anything else. Duplicates do not help. They either want both or the one that their brother has. Distraction works for the moment until they start fighting over what I distracted them with.

At first I tried to just let them work it out. I figured if I got involved I would be getting involved for the next 18 years or more. The constant crying screaming and fighting is driving me crazy along with their 4 year old sister. Any advice would be appreciated. Can you really disapline a 15 month old?

Advertisement

spurmar is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-18-2009, 07:12 AM   #2
Rollins4's Avatar
Rollins4
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Sunny AZ
Posts: 771
My Mood:
Re: Fighting twin toddlers?

We have a 4 yr old and twin 2 yr olds,, your household sounds like mine. We have told the boys to work it out and give them 2 choices,, share or toys will be trashed. It took about 2 wks, but after being left with hardly anything (we just relocated the toys), gave them a week to play with nothing and then slowly introduced the toys back. We still have fights, I think that is normal, but they are far few than we did. I found that the crazier I react the worse it is.
__________________
Cat - Blessed Mom to 4!!
DD 9, DS 6 and Twin DS's 4!
If you're not outraged..you're not paying attention!
Rollins4 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-18-2009, 08:17 AM   #3
starchaser's Avatar
starchaser
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 262
My Mood:
Re: Fighting twin toddlers?

Oh boy, this sounds all too familiar! My identical twin boys are now 4 years old, but when they first started to learn to share,I seriously thought that I was going to lose my hearng from all the screaming.They dont mind sharing so much now, but
I did exactly what Cathie suggested, and it does work to stop the bickering. Multiples are a whole different ballgame than raising one child at a time. I am scared to tell you that even right now I have a huge bag of toys hidden in my basement, as we still take the toys away when they misbehave. It is a constant battle, one always encourages or eggs on the other to do the worst case scenario,lol. I wish you the best of luck, and hang in there it will get better.
__________________
Proud WAHM momma to 4 Little Stars!Taylor-10 yrs, Jayden/Kaelen-8 yrs, and Mason-5 years!
Your Source for Baby and Mama Baltic Amber Teething Necklaces, CANADIAN Maple Teethers and Momma/Baby Inspired Items!!!: TimeDesigns!!! !
starchaser is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-18-2009, 12:14 PM   #4
Rollins4's Avatar
Rollins4
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Sunny AZ
Posts: 771
My Mood:
Re: Fighting twin toddlers?

I am so glad you started this thread!! Seriously, sometimes I feel like I am going nuts. One thing I was afraid of is if I intervened to much, the boys would think I was taking one side over the other. Also, when they are fighting over who sits where at the dinner table I just grab one and sit them down and then the other and then the choices come,, you can either sit there and eat or leave the kitchen with nothing to eat,, which one?? It took a few times and you have to stick to your guns, but it does seem to work with ours.
__________________
Cat - Blessed Mom to 4!!
DD 9, DS 6 and Twin DS's 4!
If you're not outraged..you're not paying attention!

Last edited by Rollins4; 04-18-2009 at 12:17 PM.
Rollins4 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-20-2009, 05:11 PM   #5
PsychicSandwich's Avatar
PsychicSandwich
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 164
My Mood:
Re: Fighting twin toddlers?

I have one that's always picking on the other one, and for the most part he just takes it. Everything he has, she wants, and it's true about having doubles, it doesn't make a difference. Lately he's been starting to fight back and it's driving me nuts. They are 21 months now. I am constantly taking toys away. Their play room is pretty bare right now. LOL, oh well.
PsychicSandwich is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-20-2009, 10:21 PM   #6
starchaser's Avatar
starchaser
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 262
My Mood:
Re: Fighting twin toddlers?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rollins4 View Post
Also, when they are fighting over who sits where at the dinner table I just grab one and sit them down and then the other and then the choices come,, you can either sit there and eat or leave the kitchen with nothing to eat,, which one??
OMG, this is absolutely MY HOUSE!!! Except the constant bickering seems to be about who gets the blue bowl/cup/plate,etc.
They both always want the blue whatever,lol. To top that off now their older sister says she wants it, just becasue she know it drives me mad to hear it. She always laughs after she has said it,lol.
You know when you already know it is coming before they say it, and then it happens,ARGH!!!!!!!LOL!!!
I even went out and bought several new blue bowls, and ....you guessed it, they both fight over the "same" blue bowl. Sometimes you cant win for losing I guess!
__________________
Proud WAHM momma to 4 Little Stars!Taylor-10 yrs, Jayden/Kaelen-8 yrs, and Mason-5 years!
Your Source for Baby and Mama Baltic Amber Teething Necklaces, CANADIAN Maple Teethers and Momma/Baby Inspired Items!!!: TimeDesigns!!! !
starchaser is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-21-2009, 07:17 AM   #7
Rollins4's Avatar
Rollins4
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Sunny AZ
Posts: 771
My Mood:
Re: Fighting twin toddlers?

Quote:
Originally Posted by starchaser View Post
OMG, this is absolutely MY HOUSE!!! Except the constant bickering seems to be about who gets the blue bowl/cup/plate,etc.
They both always want the blue whatever,lol. To top that off now their older sister says she wants it, just becasue she know it drives me mad to hear it. She always laughs after she has said it,lol.
You know when you already know it is coming before they say it, and then it happens,ARGH!!!!!!!LOL!!!
I even went out and bought several new blue bowls, and ....you guessed it, they both fight over the "same" blue bowl. Sometimes you cant win for losing I guess!
One time DH just threw the food on the table, no plates, no silverware anything and said "Have at it!"
__________________
Cat - Blessed Mom to 4!!
DD 9, DS 6 and Twin DS's 4!
If you're not outraged..you're not paying attention!
Rollins4 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-21-2009, 10:56 AM   #8
starchaser's Avatar
starchaser
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 262
My Mood:
Re: Fighting twin toddlers?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rollins4 View Post
One time DH just threw the food on the table, no plates, no silverware anything and said "Have at it!"
LOL!!!!! The funny thing is that I could actually picture that happening. Your dh is too funny!!!
__________________
Proud WAHM momma to 4 Little Stars!Taylor-10 yrs, Jayden/Kaelen-8 yrs, and Mason-5 years!
Your Source for Baby and Mama Baltic Amber Teething Necklaces, CANADIAN Maple Teethers and Momma/Baby Inspired Items!!!: TimeDesigns!!! !
starchaser is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-23-2009, 02:09 PM   #9
colj17's Avatar
colj17
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 201
My Mood:
Re: Fighting twin toddlers?

I have been having a problem with the boy pushing the girl down and sitting on her. He thinks it is very funny...she just cries. I have been making him sit down against the wall for 45sec-1 min (they are 22 mons) then i have him give her a hug and kiss. Not sure if it really helps...we will see
colj17 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-07-2009, 01:00 PM   #10
spurmar
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Seattle
Posts: 50
My Mood:
Re: Fighting twin toddlers?

Okay so I have started to get used to the fighting. Also one of my boys has become the taker of toys while the other is the cryer. I figure this is just personalities. I do my best to stay out of it or encourage empathy and communication of sorts. As much as a 16 month old can grasp. Everyday is a new issue but I am trying to roll with the puches so to speek.

Now my biggest concern is my passive cryer has learned the power in biting. Not just little nips either these are welting and bruising. Thank goodness he hasn't broke the skin yet. I am hoping too with time this will pass. I am trying to learn the signs and stop it before it happens but this is not always possible. Safety is my biggest concern here.

Has anyone else delt with this issue? What has worked for you? Will he grow out of this as he learns to communicate more? Please don't say bite him back. We don't hit or bite in our house so I wether it works in other familys or not that is not how i want to deal with this issue.
spurmar is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.