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Old 12-20-2006, 09:36 AM   #41
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Re: I've gotta know...

Thanks momma21princess for the encouragement. I guess I was feeling alittle alone after reading alot of these posts, though I can totally respect other people's opinions and judgment calls. I feel a bit daunted by trying to EBF and have the baby in another room but the nice thing is that we live in a townhouse so the rooms are both upstairs and side by side. Thanks for all of the ladies who posted here. I really do love hearing about this from all angles. Full-time co-sleeping, PT, not at all, cuddle time. I can't wait to figure out what works for us.

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Old 12-21-2006, 08:58 AM   #42
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We don't, never have. I am NOT against it but it just isn't for us. I can't sleep as it is so I need my own little space. DH is a very hard sleeper and would roll on Cayden and wake him up too. We started with a bassinett at arm's reach then a crib in the room. Once I felt safe enough to hear him on the monitor we moved him into his own room. He get's put down for naps at 11 and 3. I just tuck him in with eeyore and turn nighty night on and leave. Ge can't sleep any other way now! My sis thinks she can cosleep with his and rock him to sleep! It's funny to see her try because he just wants to be left alone, lol. He has a great scedule and we have our bed. My sis still allows her 2, 6 and 5 in the bed with them and they have ahorrible time self soothing and putting themselves to sleep. This is part of the reasion I did not co-sleep with Cayden. I am not against it though. It just wasn't for us.
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Old 12-21-2006, 09:30 AM   #43
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Re: I've gotta know...

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Originally Posted by kannondicarpo View Post
Thanks momma21princess for the encouragement. I guess I was feeling alittle alone after reading alot of these posts, though I can totally respect other people's opinions and judgment calls. I feel a bit daunted by trying to EBF and have the baby in another room but the nice thing is that we live in a townhouse so the rooms are both upstairs and side by side. Thanks for all of the ladies who posted here. I really do love hearing about this from all angles. Full-time co-sleeping, PT, not at all, cuddle time. I can't wait to figure out what works for us.
It's different for every family and there is no "right" way. What you decide for you and your family will be great

For us, we never heard the term "co-sleep" until about a year ago (and my kids are 2 and 3 years old). We never really established a set sleeping pattern with them at first. With DD#1 she either slept on my arm (and I didn't get much sleep) or in her bassinet in the room with us for the first few weeks, but she grew fast and had very good neck muscles and was very frustrated with the close confines of the bassinet so we moved her into her crib (we didn't use any blankets/pillows just warm sleepers) and she was much happier. She was probably 3 or 4 months old when she started sleeping through the night. On occasion she comes in bed with us, but it's usually after having a bad dream and we have taught her to cuddle for a little while and then we put her back in her bed.

With DD#2 she has always been a snuggler. I nursed her for 7 months and that whole time she was part in her bed, part in ours. I would nurse her to sleep and then put her in her bed. But usually when I got her in the middle of the night I was too lazy to get up and put her back. With all the moving/travelling we have done in the past year she is now starting to get in a habit of sleeping in her bed for the whole night and coming in to cuddle in the morning.

This works best for us since neither Dh nor I sleep well when they are in bed with us. Currently the bed DH & I are sleeping on is smaller than a double bed and when one of the girls come in the bed with us I am literally pinned against the wall laying on my side because there is not enough room. so that's *really* why we don't co-sleep
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Old 12-21-2006, 09:43 AM   #44
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Re: I've gotta know...

some advice for the OP regarding BF'ing but not getting into the co-sleeping "habit" - try putting the crib as a side-car in your room. that way, in the first few months when baby needs to be nursing all through the night you don't have to keep getting up and down (it's much easier to get a baby back to sleep who's only been woken up for a minute then one who's gotten worked up crying waiting for you to come...). but then the baby is used to his/her own space in the crib, and when you move it eventually there won't be a difficult transition.

we personally *love* co-sleeping, and have both of our kids in bed w/us. DD is 3 and has her own bed in our room which she sometimes sleeps in, and has recently told me that she wants to sleep in there "when she's 4" so we'll see how that goes. but we love cuddling w/our kids while we sleep, and they're welcome to share our bed for as long as they want.

and for me, i get a ton more sleep with them in the bed with us than i would if they weren't there. i would be a total basket case running in to check on them to see if they were still breathing, jumping at every little rustle on the baby monitor. with them right next to me, if they stir, i roll over and open one eye (or lay my hand on them) see that they're OK and fall right back to sleep. and i fall asleep easily once i get them situated to nurse, so i don't even have to wake up much to do that. and because no one ever has to wake up and cry to let me know they need me, DH sleeps through all of it and wakes up refreshed and ready for his day, too - which he wouldn't be able to do if a screaming baby woke him several times a night (and it definitely would - he's a relatively light sleeper). for us, it really works, we love it, and wouldn't think of having it any other way.

we don't find that we miss out at all on "just us" time, because we put the kids to bed and then spend lots of time together cuddling on the couch after they're asleep. and, ftr, the bed is *not* the only place to DTD also, we tend to be most amorous in the morning, so that's when the kids get to watch a movie and we sneak off to the bedroom trust me - if you have the desire, you'll find a way!!
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Old 12-21-2006, 09:48 AM   #45
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Re: I've gotta know...

We do not cosleep. DH and I are very deep sleepers, and we value our time together in our own bed.
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Old 12-21-2006, 10:21 PM   #46
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Re: I've gotta know...

We co-sleep
Abby slept with us for 18 months, and then went to her own bed in her own room without any fuss at all and sleeps beautifully~
Camille is 14 months and isn't going anywhere anytime soon.
We really wouldn't have it any other way.
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Old 12-22-2006, 07:19 AM   #47
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Re: I've gotta know...

I find it kinda funny...I don't think of myself as a co-sleeper!! KWIM??

While I do like to "snuggle" with my kids I mainly co-sleep for the ease of not having to get out of bed to nurse. (Don't get me wrong...I DO love those little feet in bed with us and the sweet breathing of a baby)

Thankfully, my older two are in their own beds and I just have my six month old with us in bed.

I realllllllllllllllly do long for my bed back!! Between my bed hog of a husband and the baby I get to lay on my side in a space about 4-6 inches wide....YIKES!! I am really getting tired of my arm falling asleep (have to keep it above my head cause I don't have room to lay on my back) and I am also growing tired of having to take ten minutes to slowly "creep" out of bed in the morning so I don't wake the baby.

I also reallllllllllllllllllly miss sleeping next to my husband. When my other two cuties slept with us (DS#1 slept with us for about 15 months....literally had to drag him out ; DD slept with us for about 9 months) my hubby never said too much. This time around it really seems to be putting a little bit of a distance between us.....it seems like we just don't have much "down" time together.
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Old 12-22-2006, 10:46 AM   #48
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Re: I've gotta know...

With our first we had no plans to co-sleep, but after a few days of no sleep I put him in bed with us. We all slept better, and it was so much easier to nurse. After the tiny newborn stage I didn't even really wake up to nurse, just lift the breast and go back to sleep. With our youngest we put him straight in bed with us. I think what's important is everyone is happy and sleeping, whether that's co-sleeping, sharing a room, or their own room. Sleep is key!

Our oldest is 13 and I've never felt dh and I weren't close. His working so much is a much bigger struggle than co-sleeping.

To the poster re: SIDS, not to argue, but the SIDS rate is MUCH lower for co-sleepers than crib sleepers. My deepest sympathy to anyone that loses a child, but I wouldn't blame it on co-sleeping.
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Old 12-22-2006, 11:13 AM   #49
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Re: I've gotta know...

I love co-sleeping, it's so nice to have that quiet peaceful time together...BUT...I don't sleep well at all...and nobody else really does either. The boys wake up a lot more when they're in bed with me (I snore, flail, and stop breathing/wake up/gasp a lot....) and dh hates it..so...it's really better for everyone to be in their own beds....with THAT said...I always lay down with ds2 to help him to sleep and then place him in his bed...and it's not totally uncommon for ds1 to fall asleep in our bed with us, but I'll move him to his bed.
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Old 12-22-2006, 01:20 PM   #50
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Re: I've gotta know...

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To the poster re: SIDS, not to argue, but the SIDS rate is MUCH lower for co-sleepers than crib sleepers. My deepest sympathy to anyone that loses a child, but I wouldn't blame it on co-sleeping.
unless you have a disorder like sleep apnoea, are obese, take medication that causes you to sleep heavily, or abuse alcohol or drugs, co-sleeping actually *decreases* the chance of SIDS, not the other way around.
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