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Old 06-22-2009, 01:12 PM   #1
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DC mamas! What do you suggest for crying kiddos when you leave the room?

besides taking them with you? I have a split foyer home and the DC is downstairs. But we have no bathroom(yet, it is in the works) and the kitchen is upstairs.
The twin girls(17 months) I have now absolutely freak out when I leave the room. Their mom says they do they same thing at home too. To keep everybody safe, I have a baby gate at the bottom of the stairs. While I am gone, they just stand there and loose it. If I have them at the table, the minute I start walking up the stairs, they get up and run towards the gate. If I tell them I'm leaving for just a bit, they cling to my legs. If I try to sneak out, the second they realize I am gone, they take off towards the stairs.
Other than taking them with me, which isn't practical at all, what do you guys do?
I NEED to go to the bathroom.
I NEED to wash my hands post diaper change.
I NEED to make lunch, bfast, snack, and carry it down the stairs.
I've never had kids do this before. Do I just let them get used to it? Do I bribe? Make it a game? Redirect them from the gate to something else?

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Old 06-22-2009, 02:12 PM   #2
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Re: DC mamas! What do you suggest for crying kiddos when you leave the room?

No advice, but I think it's actually sweet that your DC children have come to trust you so much they do that, just like our own children might do!
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Old 06-22-2009, 06:39 PM   #3
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Re: DC mamas! What do you suggest for crying kiddos when you leave the room?

I have the same problem with my 14 mo. old... I hope some of the great mama's on here have some suggestions!
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Old 06-22-2009, 06:49 PM   #4
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Re: DC mamas! What do you suggest for crying kiddos when you leave the room?

Why not just let them come with you? They are still little, so just bring a toy to keep them occupied while you take care of business.
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Old 06-22-2009, 09:40 PM   #5
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Re: DC mamas! What do you suggest for crying kiddos when you leave the room?

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Originally Posted by JollyHolly View Post
Why not just let them come with you? They are still little, so just bring a toy to keep them occupied while you take care of business.
I wish I could but it just isn't practical or safe. I'd have to help them both back down and try to carry food & drinks. Or by the time I get my hands washed & I'm back down there, I'd just be getting them upstairs. I worry about them falling down the steps and it causing a whole other issue. They really need to be okay when I leave them briefly and I want to try to help them do that in a non-traumatic way. Because I feel badly for them and I try to keep out of the room trips brief and few, but it still will happen.
So I'm kindof looking for something more practical and less obvious, but I do appreciate the suggestion! Thanks mama!
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Old 06-22-2009, 09:45 PM   #6
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Re: DC mamas! What do you suggest for crying kiddos when you leave the room?

I don't mean to be snarky here, but can you even legally leave them downstairs while you are upstairs making lunch, etc? I have a split foyer home as well and I feel for you as I HATE those stairs and how divided things are, I'm just wondering about the fact that the kids are out of your site while you are upstairs.
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Old 06-22-2009, 10:17 PM   #7
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Re: DC mamas! What do you suggest for crying kiddos when you leave the room?

Not snarky. Legitimate ?. But do you take the kids to the bathroom with you? Do you sit in the room and watch them nap? Do you change everyone's diapers and never wash your hands? Unless everything is in 1 room with no walls or doors, kids are out of our sight at times. I am just tying to make those times easier for them. I'm out of sight for maybe 2 minutes at the most. I pre-plate meals night before and just heat them up. Pre-pour milks & juices in sippys and try to use the restroom sparingly.
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Old 06-22-2009, 10:27 PM   #8
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Re: DC mamas! What do you suggest for crying kiddos when you leave the room?

I'm with you. Children are out of our site at times. Obviously as short a time as possible...but it is part of life with kids. There are no laws about keeping children in your site at all times. I would try music, can they hear you if you call down to them. Sing to them maybe from up there. If they can hear you maybe they won't be as freaked out? dare I say it...is there a Tv down there?? Terrible I know...and then how do you turn it off when you get back anyhow. Probably not a good idea. Tough one mama! I hope it gets better!
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Old 06-22-2009, 10:40 PM   #9
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Re: DC mamas! What do you suggest for crying kiddos when you leave the room?

Ok, so I'll probably feel some heat for this, but just let them cry. It's not going to kill them for you to out of sight for 2mins. I went through this with my neices (twins also, just FYI). I would spend forever trying to redirect or reassure them, that I could have peed, made lunch and done a load of laundry. It broke my heart but I started letting them just fuss when I left the room. They never died, got hurt or anything else bad. Just some runny noses from crying. Eventually they outgrew the phase or learned that I wasn't abandoning them and would just keep playing till I got back. I think you run more risks trying to get 2 17m olds up/down stair and keeping them out of anything hazardous in the kitchen/bathroom.
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Old 06-22-2009, 11:00 PM   #10
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Re: DC mamas! What do you suggest for crying kiddos when you leave the room?

I would just talk to them. Tell them I will be right back, you will be ok, I need to ... There is no reason to be upset, I am right here. etc, just talk the whole time you are gone. They will get use to it.
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