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Old 09-14-2009, 09:15 AM   #1
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Unhappy dd will not go to sleep, stay asleep, or sleep PERIOD!

i have no idea what to do...this has been going on for the past couple weeks and now she's just so incredibly overtired that we're spiraling downward even faster i usually nurse and rock her to sleep, but she started fighting that (unlatching, trying to roll around, grabbing at me, etc) so i tried laying her down and letting her fall asleep on her own/patting her back/etc and she just doesn't.go.to.sleep. if i lay her down and leave her she just lays in her crib and plays, rolls around, sings, throws her blanket and bink out, etc, etc. if i stay in there she'll lay and let me pat her back for a while, but doesn't go to sleep. seriously...i've been trying to get her down for her morning nap for the past hour and a half when she does fall asleep with me rocking her, she wakes up when i lay her down (which she has NEVER done up until now).

we're usually on a pretty good schedule: wake 7:30, nap 9:30-11:00, nap 2:00-3:30, bedtime 8:00 but all this crazy sleep mess has totally obliterated that. with her taking anywhere from 10 minutes to over an hour to fall asleep everything is just totally unpredictable and shot. i think her little body is just totally confused, she even pooped in the night last night and she hasn't done that since she was just a couple months old.

i have no idea how to get back on schedule or how to get her to sleep...should i just keep her up as much as possible today and try to reset in the morning tomorrow??? i know it sounds stupid, but i can't get her to sleep more to make up for the deficit because she won't even go to sleep!

what the heck do i do?!?!?!

ETA: she's 10 months old and the one time she will still sleep is nighttime...once i finally get her to sleep she usually sttn.

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Old 09-14-2009, 09:28 AM   #2
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Re: dd will not go to sleep, stay asleep, or sleep PERIOD!

At that age I had to nurse and walk with ds to get him to take a nap. No easy feet, considering he weighed about 27lbs. I think he was just too interested in crawling, walking, learning new things. So, I would hold him and nurse him and walk up and down the hallway until he fell asleep. The I would carefully lay down with him and gently unlatch him, make sure he was still asleep, then creep away. I had to do this for a month? or less? Now he is back to wanting to be rocked and nursed. It is probably just a phase for your dd, give it time and patience
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Old 09-14-2009, 09:43 AM   #3
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Re: dd will not go to sleep, stay asleep, or sleep PERIOD!

we're in the same boat. i was thinking of starting a "my baby will not sleep" support thread this morning. im that tired.

i was told that if i keep my LO up all day she'll be so overtired that her night will be even worse.

obviously im in no position to give advice tho since im sitting here with 30 pound bags under my eyes right now...
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Old 09-14-2009, 09:53 AM   #4
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Re: dd will not go to sleep, stay asleep, or sleep PERIOD!

I have found (with my own difficult napper) that keeping them up does more harm then good.

I know I will probably get burned from saying this but if I were you I would try CIO. DS started fighting me putting him to sleep early on so we did some mild sleep training. The later in the day it got the more he cried and the more I cried. In the long run though he puts himself to sleep like a champ. I think that in his fighting us helping him go down he was telling us that he needed to know how to put himself to sleep. It might surprise you how little crying it might take for her to drift off. DS's max was probably 45 minutes like twice in the last 3 months.

It can be very enlightening for a little while to not be spending all of your time trying to put the baby to sleep. I'm not saying it always is as I have a hard time doing anything else except obsessing over the baby monitor if DS is crying but now I am soooooo glad we did it! I can actually wash the dishes and make the bed and most of the time make dinner too!! Woohoo!
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Old 09-14-2009, 09:55 AM   #5
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Re: dd will not go to sleep, stay asleep, or sleep PERIOD!

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Originally Posted by boos_mom View Post
i was told that if i keep my LO up all day she'll be so overtired that her night will be even worse.
That's true until they're a little older. Over 18 months, in my experience (It works great once they're older than 18 months).

OP - any chance that she's getting teeth? I know my daughter's sleep schedule went WACKY whenever she was getting new teeth or had hit another development milestone.
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Old 09-14-2009, 09:56 AM   #6
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Re: dd will not go to sleep, stay asleep, or sleep PERIOD!

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At that age I had to nurse and walk with ds to get him to take a nap. No easy feet, considering he weighed about 27lbs. I think he was just too interested in crawling, walking, learning new things. So, I would hold him and nurse him and walk up and down the hallway until he fell asleep. The I would carefully lay down with him and gently unlatch him, make sure he was still asleep, then creep away. I had to do this for a month? or less? Now he is back to wanting to be rocked and nursed. It is probably just a phase for your dd, give it time and patience
wow you sound so level headed and sane i figure it's a phase, teething, curiosity, milestones, or something but i guess i'm just so overwhelmed and frustrated i can't see the light at the end of the tunnel i honestly think i'm going to give up on the laying her down and self soothing thing and just keep holding her and rocking or try walking around her room. she has VERY busy hands and arms (they're always flailing, grabbing, rubbing, scratching, or something) so i'm thinking i might go back to swaddling her arms to help her settle to sleep (but unwrapping her before i lay her down)

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we're in the same boat. i was thinking of starting a "my baby will not sleep" support thread this morning. im that tired.

i was told that if i keep my LO up all day she'll be so overtired that her night will be even worse.

obviously im in no position to give advice tho since im sitting here with 30 pound bags under my eyes right now...
i did that a while back when dd wasn't sleeping well! we kept the thread going for a few weeks but then i moved and never got back in the habit of starting up the thread every week it's like we go through ebbs and flows...she'll sleep AMAZING for a while and then it all comes crashing down...it's like she's sleep bi-polar or something! i try to think of how lucky i am to have those good periods, because ds was a TERRIBLE sleeper and didn't sttn until somewhere between 18-24 months (i stopped counting ) and still doesn't sleep well at almost 6 years old.
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Old 09-14-2009, 10:01 AM   #7
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Re: dd will not go to sleep, stay asleep, or sleep PERIOD!

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Originally Posted by Tribro View Post
I have found (with my own difficult napper) that keeping them up does more harm then good.

I know I will probably get burned from saying this but if I were you I would try CIO. DS started fighting me putting him to sleep early on so we did some mild sleep training. The later in the day it got the more he cried and the more I cried. In the long run though he puts himself to sleep like a champ. I think that in his fighting us helping him go down he was telling us that he needed to know how to put himself to sleep. It might surprise you how little crying it might take for her to drift off. DS's max was probably 45 minutes like twice in the last 3 months.

It can be very enlightening for a little while to not be spending all of your time trying to put the baby to sleep. I'm not saying it always is as I have a hard time doing anything else except obsessing over the baby monitor if DS is crying but now I am soooooo glad we did it! I can actually wash the dishes and make the bed and most of the time make dinner too!! Woohoo!
yeah i figured that about keeping her up, but honestly she's so sleep deprived at this point i figured it couldn't make things any worse, right?

i can't CIO because she doesn't cry...seriously, she just lays in there and plays...she takes off her socks, throws her binks and blanket out of the crib, talks and sings to herself, etc, etc the longest i've lasted trying to let her fall asleep on her own is an hour and a half and i swear to you she never cried for one second. i'd go in, lay her down, tuck her back in every 5-7-10 mins etc, but she just gets back up and goes back to whatever she was doing. and of course while she's in there, there's no way i can do anything except listen to her on the monitor and get totally frazzled trying to figure out what to do and ironically the more times i tried letting her go to sleep on her own, the LONGER it has taken each.and.every.time (not vice versa like the books all say )
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Old 09-14-2009, 10:03 AM   #8
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Re: dd will not go to sleep, stay asleep, or sleep PERIOD!

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i did that a while back when dd wasn't sleeping well! we kept the thread going for a few weeks but then i moved and never got back in the habit of starting up the thread every week it's like we go through ebbs and flows...she'll sleep AMAZING for a while and then it all comes crashing down...it's like she's sleep bi-polar or something! i try to think of how lucky i am to have those good periods, because ds was a TERRIBLE sleeper and didn't sttn until somewhere between 18-24 months (i stopped counting ) and still doesn't sleep well at almost 6 years old.
my oldest was born an amazing sleeper. my 2nd was a little tougher, but baby #3 brings a whole new meaning to the term "light sleeper". she can't be mine! i could never be so cute and giggly after such little sleep LOL

i've gone back to swaddling her now that her arms seem to have a life of their own. but she breaks through the swaddle blanket every night.

i almost hit rock bottom at 4am this morning when my SO completely failed at helping me put boo back to sleep. but 5 minutes of bouncing her back to sleep and i had managed to soothe myself too. i just wish i could nap at work!
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Old 09-14-2009, 10:08 AM   #9
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Re: dd will not go to sleep, stay asleep, or sleep PERIOD!

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my oldest was born an amazing sleeper. my 2nd was a little tougher, but baby #3 brings a whole new meaning to the term "light sleeper". she can't be mine! i could never be so cute and giggly after such little sleep LOL

i've gone back to swaddling her now that her arms seem to have a life of their own. but she breaks through the swaddle blanket every night.

i almost hit rock bottom at 4am this morning when my SO completely failed at helping me put boo back to sleep. but 5 minutes of bouncing her back to sleep and i had managed to soothe myself too. i just wish i could nap at work!
my kids seem to be going in reverse! maybe if we have a 3rd they'll magically sttn from day 1 and never have nap troubles ds was a much better napper than night sleeper and dd is the opposite just when you think you have something figured out, they change it on you!

i always chill out SO much when i just go in and hold her...i guess i should take that as a hint and try that more often instead of driving myself crazy obsessing over the monitor

i used to nap in my car on my lunch break! i stay at home with dd and you think i'd be napping, but it just doesn't happen
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Old 09-14-2009, 10:16 AM   #10
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Re: dd will not go to sleep, stay asleep, or sleep PERIOD!

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my kids seem to be going in reverse! maybe if we have a 3rd they'll magically sttn from day 1 and never have nap troubles ds was a much better napper than night sleeper and dd is the opposite just when you think you have something figured out, they change it on you!

i always chill out SO much when i just go in and hold her...i guess i should take that as a hint and try that more often instead of driving myself crazy obsessing over the monitor

i used to nap in my car on my lunch break! i stay at home with dd and you think i'd be napping, but it just doesn't happen
ive been known to nap in the car during lunch too but now i drive home everyday at lunch to nurse.

im monitor-challenged. i always think its not working LOL
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