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Old 10-09-2009, 01:02 PM   #1
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definatly done

so we went back and forth because part of me grew up thinking I'd have 5 kids. The more this pregnancy has gone on the more I'm sure I'm done. Not because I'm just fed up wit being pregnant or anything like that, in fact I'm fully enjoying my pregnancy and have those emotions like wow.. this is the last..

we have 2 boys and now going to be 2 girls. Can't get much better then that lol

But the more it's gone on the more I just feel set and that our family is complete. So we've decided I will be tying my tubes during my c section. I had gone back and forth on that because I heard some things but after discussing it with my dr he said that it seems more that the people who have problems like heavier periods and such are people who were used to being on birth controle and controlling hormones and such. Since I haven't been on birth controle since I was 17 becasue I don't believe in it and made my own opinion about it as I got older, then we should be okay. My husband's getting done too but just in case he doesn't get in to get it done before his next deployment or they give him a run around or something I'd rather at least get mine done for sure while we can.

so this is it, definatly the last for us. I am very passionate about adoption and always wanted to adopt a child so we decided that once we get re settled in our next duty station we will probably look into foster parenting like we've talked about then and we can always adopt like we want if we decide we want more.

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Old 10-09-2009, 01:59 PM   #2
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Re: definatly done

thats great laci. i know that we are all done also. dh is going to get the big v done at the end month.
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Old 10-09-2009, 04:45 PM   #3
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Re: definatly done

Aww laci. I am having mixed feelings this will be 5 4 boys and her. But I don't want to say it for sure. Only because I know after sometime I will want another. But we are waiting 2 years at least. And then we will decide. Probably 6 is my limit half a dozen kids loool but that is very very respectful that he is getting the big V as well as you getting fixed. That's sweet of him because hey its only fair right???
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Old 10-09-2009, 06:26 PM   #4
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Re: definatly done

I feel very done but not confident enough to take permanent action.
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Old 10-10-2009, 09:40 AM   #5
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Re: definatly done

It's weird, ALL of my friends have their tubes tied except one and I'm struggling to have my first bio child. I respect their choices for their families, but it is painful for me to hear about it. One friend and my ex SIL now want to have the procedure reversed.

Due to my struggles, I vowed never again to take bc, but I also don't know if I could emotionally handle another pg. I'm torn. I have adopted twice and plan to return to doing foster care in the near future.I never set out to adopt, just fell in love with some children, but I think adoption is the best choice for me if I decide to expand my family more.
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Old 10-10-2009, 10:19 AM   #6
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Re: definatly done

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Originally Posted by lydiamom View Post
I feel very done but not confident enough to take permanent action.


I actually need to talk to my midwife about BC options at one of my next appointments...thanks for reminding me!
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Old 10-12-2009, 08:24 PM   #7
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Re: definatly done

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Originally Posted by fanatic4cloth View Post
Aww laci. I am having mixed feelings this will be 5 4 boys and her. But I don't want to say it for sure. Only because I know after sometime I will want another. But we are waiting 2 years at least. And then we will decide. Probably 6 is my limit half a dozen kids loool but that is very very respectful that he is getting the big V as well as you getting fixed. That's sweet of him because hey its only fair right???
he was getting done regardless, he's actually against me doing mine. I'm pretty sure I'm doing it though but he keeps trying to talk me out of it because he's heard things here and there with complications and he just doesn't want me to do it.

The reason I'm leaning for doing it is 1) I'm already ready for it to be done with the c section and 2) we were pretty sure we wanted to have it done after my daughter and the military wouldn't let him do it because he was so young and had one bio child. (the boys aren't his) so my fear is since he is a little younger then me that we will still run into this problem when he goes to get done and then wind up with another pregnancy that we really don't need to have. Granted I'd be happy of any pregnancy but since mine are so high risk he needs to be home for them. He deploys again around the time this one is 6 months old.. I could just see me getting pregnant before he left and having to go home. Or me getting pregnant on R&R (which I did last R&R) or homecoming or something lol I'm very against birth controle for various reasons, don't want to be on it. We always did NFP and said if we were unsure we'd do NFP still and only get fixed when we knew for sure. The dr hasn't told me I can't have another pregnancy but between 4 misscarriages and 3 high risk pregnancies I think I'm just done all around myself. I may change my mind and back out and then give some time to decide but I just don't know if I want to do another high risk pregnancy while trying to take care of my older kids needs again. Last time we didn't have sports, school, etc. It wasn't an issue. I feel like they have missed so much more this time. We have done well to have them not miss to much and hubby make sure they don't but I still feel like they do.
But then it's like where will we be the next duty station. How will the dr be there? The hospital. I had no idea when I got pregnant here that it was going to be such a dang hassle for care! If I had gotten the care I was SUPPOSSED to get in the beginning I might have avoided half my problems! I went through so many drs at first it was just exhausting!
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Old 10-13-2009, 10:06 AM   #8
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Re: definatly done

aww laci. I remember how the navy was with prenatal care. it took forever to see someone. I was almost 16 wks pregnant before i did with dd. I couldnt believe it. hugs
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and "adopted mom" to K(9), J(5), and J(3 months)
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Old 10-13-2009, 11:16 AM   #9
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Re: definatly done

We're also talking about DH getting a V done in Dec.
We're both just really feeling done. Our financial situation and our house can't take another child, so if we did want another one, it would need to be a ways down the road... We've always wanted to adopt so we've decided that if we have another one, we will adopt.
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Old 10-13-2009, 10:34 PM   #10
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Re: definatly done

Quote:
Originally Posted by bryandcam+2 View Post
aww laci. I remember how the navy was with prenatal care. it took forever to see someone. I was almost 16 wks pregnant before i did with dd. I couldnt believe it. hugs
I delivered my first one through the navy and had no problems what so ever I was seen at 6 weeks on.

My 2nd was navy till about 16 weeks then I went home and transfered to Army. Same thing with him and no problems what so ever.

3rd child was Army and since I was already high risk the normal protocol I think was 12 weeks but if you are high risk it's suppossed to not matter the normal protocol.

So this was my first bad experience with military. I totally didn't expect it. Now I'm with civilian and delivering civilian though
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