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Old 11-12-2009, 11:53 AM   #1
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Can I do this w/out a doula?

I am due in Jan and really want to have a VBAC. Up until a few weeks ago I had been interviewing and planning on having a doula but some unexpected bills have caused us to use the money we had set aside for doula fees.

DH and I are both really committed to having a VBAC, my weight has been much lower this time, I do yoga 2x a week and we have been up to our eyeballs in research on ways we can be successful. I just really felt that having a doula was a key to making this work and am starting to doubt being able to do it without one.

What are your thoughts mamas? Can I do this with just DH and I?

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Old 11-12-2009, 12:08 PM   #2
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Re: Can I do this w/out a doula?

I, personally, would not have been able to handle labor w/out my doula. But that's because my hubby... well... hid out in the corner for the most part - unless she TOLD him to do something. She was all the support I needed apparently, and more!
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Old 11-12-2009, 12:22 PM   #3
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Re: Can I do this w/out a doula?

I think EVERY woman is capable of a completely natural, pain-med-free birth if that is what she wants and has set her mind to

I think a doula might make it easier/more comfortable - but I TOTALLY believe in you and a woman's own internal power, to birth your baby!
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Old 11-12-2009, 12:23 PM   #4
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Re: Can I do this w/out a doula?

It can be done! I know that doulas are wonderful for support and advocacy, but not everyone needs that. I've never had a c-section, but have had 2 births without a doula. The first with stadol and the second med-free. I plan on this coming one to be the same. Good luck mama, I think confidence in your ability is key.
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Old 11-12-2009, 12:24 PM   #5
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Re: Can I do this w/out a doula?

You can do it BUT you need to know that they won't be able to scare DH into things that you agreed not to have... I look at the doula as the person to see things from the outside, have the knowledge to explain the choices to you, and to help you not be bullied.
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Old 11-12-2009, 12:26 PM   #6
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Re: Can I do this w/out a doula?

If your dh is involved as you describe, you should have no problem. I really like reading some of the bradley books for all this. I would read different things to my dh that I thought were important for him. Since it's husband coached labor it really bring him into the mix. But I agree with everyone. You sound like you're in great shape and very healthy. You should be able to do this with a doula with dh giving you the support (which is actually the way my dh and I prefer it.)
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Old 11-12-2009, 01:14 PM   #7
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Re: Can I do this w/out a doula?

I have done 4 births without a doula. 3 were med free(I had an epidural that didn't take on one side for my first). I wouldn't want to have a doula and will be doing this again in the next few weeks with just my hubby as a coach. With our first he wasn't even sure he wanted to be in the room because he was afraid that he would pass out. I told him he had no choice, he was there at conception and he would be there for the birth even if he was lying on the floor out cold. He really stepped up and was awesome! He is very supportive and is all the help I need. I fully believe you can do it without a doula, you just have to decide what you want and believe in yourself.
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Old 11-12-2009, 01:20 PM   #8
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Re: Can I do this w/out a doula?

I haven't had a doula for previous births but I have had my sister and a friend there to help me out for two previous unmedicated births. The big thing I wanted from them was to help me stay focused. They helped a lot since DH was a bit overwhelmed. Do you have a really good friend who could help you or a family member you trust? I liked having someone there who helped me 'keep my eye on the prize' so to speak.
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Old 11-12-2009, 03:10 PM   #9
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Re: Can I do this w/out a doula?

You don't NEED a doula, but having one will increase your likely hood of a successful VBAC. If I were you I would really think about how VBAC friendly your birth attendants/hospital are, why you ended up with your previous cesarean, and how well your DH handles stress and if he is REALLY good at keeping you calm, comfortable and focused, and then decide whether or not having an extra advocate there is necessary.

Also, how much money will you save by having a VBAC vs another section? How much money will you save by not spending 6 weeks recovering from surgery? It could be that having a doula would actually pay for herself...
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Old 11-12-2009, 08:36 PM   #10
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Re: Can I do this w/out a doula?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ErinMartin View Post
I think EVERY woman is capable of a completely natural, pain-med-free birth if that is what she wants and has set her mind to

I think a doula might make it easier/more comfortable - but I TOTALLY believe in you and a woman's own internal power, to birth your baby!
Quote:
Originally Posted by ClothDiaperMePlease View Post
You can do it BUT you need to know that they won't be able to scare DH into things that you agreed not to have... I look at the doula as the person to see things from the outside, have the knowledge to explain the choices to you, and to help you not be bullied.
Totally agree with the above posts..

Also, as a doula, I wanted to offer you another option you might not have considered.

Calling DONA International and giving them your location can often get you in touch with trained, but not yet certified doulas in your area. Doula's in training mostly take partial payments, and occasionally do births for free! If you really are set on a doula - I'd totally call. Check out DONA.org for their number.
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