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Old 12-10-2009, 09:02 PM   #1
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Red face Am I failing by not having a schedual??

DS is 7 1/2 months. bfed on demand, (only eats half a jar of food each day) & that I have no qualms about. But his sleep, or lack thereof is out of control. Right now he's sick; getting over a cold and ear infection, so I understand that has some play as well as teething, but OMG! 3 nights ago he was up until 3 am & I had to drive him around. The night after that he went to bed at 2. & woke up at 4 for awhile. Last night he slept. As for naps, he's been getting like an hour hour and a half a day right now. (again, I attribute it to what's going on) but; he NEVER follows a schedual, even when he's not sick. So some babies just don't like them, right?? Should I force him into one? would it be beneficial or do you think it's worthless to try?? I mean he's EXAHUSTED during the day; his eyes get dark & he's crabby off and on, but he'll play and be happy too. I'm so frusterated right now. & especially because I have a sinus infection too, & am the only one dealing with him because DH is busy w/school & work.
Sorry, I guess this was more of a rant.
I know kids thrive on scheduals for the most part; he just absolutely fights them with everything he has(at least for sleep). I even (absolutely hate CIO) but tried it & for 10 mins he cried. He would continue all night, and I CANNOT let him just pass out from that. He has me wrapped around hsi finger; as soon as I put him in his crib he cries. sometimes it's real, but a lot of times it's fake. stinker!

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Old 12-10-2009, 09:07 PM   #2
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Re: Am I failing by not having a schedual??

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Originally Posted by mrseum View Post
I know kids thrive on scheduals for the most part; he just absolutely fights them with everything he has(at least for sleep).
I think children often thrive with routine, not schedule. It's parents who like to schedule. Babies can't tell time.

Personally I'm not a big schedule person so attempting to institute one would have certainly been a disaster.

When babies are sick and/or teething, all bets are off, IMO! You'll be better able to evaluate things when he's in good health and good spirits. I say take it off the table for now and see how it goes when he's 100%.
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Old 12-10-2009, 09:32 PM   #3
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Re: Am I failing by not having a schedual??

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I think children often thrive with routine, not schedule. It's parents who like to schedule. Babies can't tell time.

Personally I'm not a big schedule person so attempting to institute one would have certainly been a disaster.

When babies are sick and/or teething, all bets are off, IMO! You'll be better able to evaluate things when he's in good health and good spirits. I say take it off the table for now and see how it goes when he's 100%.
Thanks; I meant routine, really. I'm kind of bad at a schedual too. So it's a lot to follow through. But I try, because I feel like it could be good. I see my friends 2 year old, and he's in SUCH a good routine it's unbelievable. of course, he is TWO. not 7 1/2 months! I'll definately reevaluate when he's better. I suppose I'm just the one with the issue here; I'm tired of staying up until 1-2am, & I feel like that's NOT a good habit to start. I'm sure it'll change as he gets older. Mama just needs some more patience.
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Old 12-11-2009, 05:03 AM   #4
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Re: Am I failing by not having a schedual??

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Originally Posted by musicalisa View Post
I think children often thrive with routine, not schedule. It's parents who like to schedule. Babies can't tell time.

Personally I'm not a big schedule person so attempting to institute one would have certainly been a disaster.

When babies are sick and/or teething, all bets are off, IMO! You'll be better able to evaluate things when he's in good health and good spirits. I say take it off the table for now and see how it goes when he's 100%.
Definitely agree with this! And like you mentioned, your friends child who's 2 is doing beautifully! They do get there But many times you can't even really tell their own natural [not time watched] routine/schedule.

And when they do have issues going on like illness/teething, it really does through their body for a loop.

So even though it's tough, just continue to go with the flow. If driving around comforts him, I would keep doing it for a bit. The hum and vibration of the vehicle really probably does smooth him emotionally and physically!

And FWIW, I don't sleep train or schedule my children. I'm pretty much child-led all the way. My first son, I could tell his own natural routine by 6 months of age! And at 3 years old, he still sticks to that on his own.

My 17 month old, I only begin seeing his natural routine emerge around 14 months! And now, he's pretty much in his own groove and doing great!

So it does happen, it may take a while, but it happens!

Your doing great mama!!
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Old 12-11-2009, 05:46 AM   #5
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Re: Am I failing by not having a schedual??

I think providing a routine will help your DS immensely. But it will take time and patience on your part. The books that helped me the most are the No Cry Sleep Solution and Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby. Another good one is the Baby Whisperer's EASY routine, Eat, Activity, Sleep, time for You. I really started to get into a routine with my DS around 6 months and it made my life and his so much easier and restful.

And as PP's said, when baby is sick/teething the routine has to be flexible. Think of it as teaching and not as enforcing a schedule/routine
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Old 12-11-2009, 06:03 AM   #6
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Re: Am I failing by not having a schedual??

Hey Mama - I'm with you...not getting sleep and cranky baby is tough. We're really working on a routine around here too, but some nights are just not good. Hugs to you. I read the no-cry sleep solution too. I like it because it gives principles and ideas to try not rules/schedules. You don't have to do all the recording and stuff it suggests...just get some tips. (it also gives information about how much sleep babies need, etc.) Hope it gets better.
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Old 12-11-2009, 08:11 AM   #7
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Re: Am I failing by not having a schedual??

FWIW, I never really enforced a routine on 10-month-old DS. He didn't seem to need/want one, and it seemed like it wasn't worth the bother to make a happy baby unhappy by demanding that he nap/eat at specific times.

However, in the last month or so he has settled unprompted into his own (fairly rigid) sleep schedule - naps are at 9:30 a.m. and 2 p.m., and bedtime is almost exactly at 9 p.m. If this schedule gets upset, so does he. It may worth trying to get your DS on a schedule, to see if it helps diminish the unhappy periods. If it doesn't, though, don't beat yourself up. Your DS may not be ready for a schedule yet, or ever. As with so many things, your milege will definitely vary.

Oh, and for what it's worth:
I don't know your position on medicine, but when I know DS is cutting a tooth I will give him a half-dose of Tylenol right before bed. He always sleeps much better when I do. (During the day, I won't dose him until it's absolutely necessary, and if a bit of diluted clove oil is not doing the trick. I believe in the healing power of sleep, though and I don't want his teething pain ruining the quality of his sleep.)
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Old 12-11-2009, 08:44 AM   #8
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Re: Am I failing by not having a schedual??

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Originally Posted by Sleep deprived View Post
FWIW, I never really enforced a routine on 10-month-old DS. He didn't seem to need/want one, and it seemed like it wasn't worth the bother to make a happy baby unhappy by demanding that he nap/eat at specific times.

However, in the last month or so he has settled unprompted into his own (fairly rigid) sleep schedule - naps are at 9:30 a.m. and 2 p.m., and bedtime is almost exactly at 9 p.m. If this schedule gets upset, so does he. It may worth trying to get your DS on a schedule, to see if it helps diminish the unhappy periods. If it doesn't, though, don't beat yourself up. Your DS may not be ready for a schedule yet, or ever. As with so many things, your milege will definitely vary.

Oh, and for what it's worth:
I don't know your position on medicine, but when I know DS is cutting a tooth I will give him a half-dose of Tylenol right before bed. He always sleeps much better when I do. (During the day, I won't dose him until it's absolutely necessary, and if a bit of diluted clove oil is not doing the trick. I believe in the healing power of sleep, though and I don't want his teething pain ruining the quality of his sleep.)
Thanks!!
I think I'm just jumping the gun; I know he'll eventually wind up with his own routine... & I do give him tylenol before bed. And orajel, or Hylands teething tablets, they all seem to work for a few minutes-half an hour after they kick in and that's it. Poor baby. His two bottom teeth are halfway through and his two top teeth are ready to break the surface, so he has a lot going on in there.
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Old 12-11-2009, 08:47 AM   #9
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Re: Am I failing by not having a schedual??

Thanks for making me feel a bit better mamas. I appreciate it. I think that after I try to get to the clinic today I'll try to pick up the no cry sleep solution. I've been wanting to get it; I've just put it off. I think I'm ready. I wish I could figure out at least how to get DS to sleep on his own by myself, but unfortunately all my ideas aren't working. He's a toughie!
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Old 12-11-2009, 08:53 AM   #10
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Re: Am I failing by not having a schedual??

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His two bottom teeth are halfway through and his two top teeth are ready to break the surface, so he has a lot going on in there.

DS broke 4 teeth in 10 days. It was a horrible week-and-a-half. It gets better when it's done, though!
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