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Old 12-21-2009, 10:55 AM   #1
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Potty Learning?

Help! My ds is 3.4 and still not potty learned!

I have tried everything I think . . . and he absolutely WILL NOT poop on the toilet. He recently told me, "Mommy, I go poop on the potty when I'm big like daddy." I nearly fell over. I told him, that no, he will be going on the potty sooner than that.

We also tell him that he is not a big boy yet, and that since he poops in his diaper like a baby, he must still be a baby. We make the comparison that babies poop in their dipes, and so does he, hence, he is still a baby.

I have tried reward systems and numerous other things.

I know I can't force him (and wouldn't) but jeez, when the hec is this little guy gonna DO IT!!!!

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Old 12-21-2009, 02:12 PM   #2
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Re: Potty Learning?

As long as he wears a diaper, he'll go in. Take the diaper away and after a few accidents, he just may realize, hey I have to go on the potty! If he's peeing on the potty consistently I'd take away diapers (except at night, I still put my girls in Flip diapers in case of accidents since they are out once they fall asleep). Sure there will be accidents, but that's just being a kid (my near 8 year old DS has more skid marks in his underwear than both girls combined! ) But don't go back and forth with diapers and underwear, once you make the switch, you've made the switch.

and btw, 2 of my friend's kids didn't get out of diapers until they were 5 years old and about to go to kindergarten. It was because she never took the diapers away because once she took them away, they went on the potty. She learned that lesson though by her 4th
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Old 12-21-2009, 03:17 PM   #3
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Re: Potty Learning?

My DD has just started PT as well, she will go in her big girl pants or diapers if they're on... so we just let her run around naked, and she is almost at the point of no accidents, within a week! We did have a few poos and wees on the floor, but hey... it's part of the whole deal and she has caught on very quickly. I'm at the point of thinking we can start trying with big girl pants now and see if she can manage to keep them dry before i'm game enough to go out of the house without a diaper on.

Also, we have Elmo Potty Time dvd and my dd has loved to watch it since she was little, I think it's really helped her when we say 'Look how Elmo goes to the potty, he's such a big boy!'
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Old 12-21-2009, 04:43 PM   #4
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Re: Potty Learning?

My DS was 4 years 9 months when he finally potty trained. I took him to Wal-Mart and let him pick out his own underwear. I made a big deal about how he was going to wear underwear like daddy and mommy, and no mor diapers. And since he was a big boy, this was really cool. And Mommy and Daddy pee pee and poo poo in the toilet, because we weaer underwear too.

Then Sunday after church, when we got home, I took his diaper off and started to put his underwear on. He cried a little and said he wanted his diaper. I said "Nope, you're a big boy now, and big boys don't wear diapers. They wear underwear and pee pee and poo poo in the toilet." I then gave him the choice. "You can wear big boy underwear, or you can be naked." He thought for a second and told me "I wear underwear."

Then we LITERALLY didn't go anywhere for 3 days, so we could focus just on potty training. Of course we had accidents, and when he had to poop he cried a little and said "Mommy, I have to poop poop, I need my diaper." I said "Nope, I'm sorry, if you need to poop poop then you go do it in the toilet."

In addition to this, I also used a reward system with stickers and jelly beans. My DS LOVES stickers, ESPECIALLY sparkly ones. So I made a sticker chart out of colored paper and each time he peed he got a sticker, poop got two stickers (he got to pick the stickers out and put them on the chart himself) and after he had 5 stickers then he got a SPECIAL sparkly sticker (all of the stickers were just happy faces, bought 'em at Wal-mart or Kroger).

He also got one jelly bean for pees and two for poops. And I bought him a stool so that he could turn the bathroom light on and off by himself and so he could wash his hands all by himself. He is very "I can do it myself." So this was another incentive for him.

On the 4th day, I had to go to the grocery store for a few things, so I asked him to go potty before we left. And when we got to the store I told him "Ok, if you need to potty, you be sure to tell me, because they have a potty here that you can use." We were in the store like 10 minutes and my big boy said "Mommy, I need to potty."

So.. for us, it just took 3 days of being at home with no diapers allowed.

If you give in and give him a diaper, then he'll use it. But if he can truly understand that you want him to pee and poop in the toilet, then it's worth a shot to just say "no diapers." I had tried potty training before this pint with DS, but he really just wasn't ready. But once I KNEW that he could understand what I wanted and what I expected, and he could CLEARLY communicate his needs to me, then I realized that he was ready and just beintg stubborn...but really, I think because I DID wait so long, it made it easier.

Sorry so long, just wanted to be thourough!

Oh, of course he had his FAVORITE underwear (Nemo or Cars) so those went on FIRST every day, he stayed dry longer, because he knew once they were dirty, that he couldn't wear them anymore.

God bless,
Michellew
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Old 12-22-2009, 08:33 AM   #5
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Re: Potty Learning?

Thank you so much ladies!

I think this is where I'm going wrong. He is still in his fluff. I've had him in underwear, but chicken out after a few accidents. I need to try (during this Christmas vaca from work for the next 2 weeks) to stick to my guns.

He's gonna use his underwear. I'll probably have to hide all the diapers (maybe I'll tell him the diaper fairy had to take them to a baby nearby or something) and that he is a big boy now so he needs to use the underwear.

I have a few pairs of the padded underwear, too. I'll probably start with those so that if we have any liquid accidents I'm not cleaning the rug a hundred times again.

Thanks for the help!!!!
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Old 12-22-2009, 11:21 AM   #6
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Re: Potty Learning?

We also had to take the diapers away from my DD before she would even begin to PL. She has always been very content to sit in a full (or stinky ) diaper so she really had no desire to PL.

She used to go to daycare back then and the daycare lady's daughter Liza was a little under 1. My DD ADORES this little girl. So one weekend, I went out and got her a couple packs of padded panties and we made a big deal about putting all her diapers in a bag. I told her, "diapers are for babies, you're a big girl now. The babies need these diapers more than you do." And my DD responded, "Diapers for Liza?" And I said, "yes, we're going to give the diapers to Liza." It was pretty hard but now, about 4 months later, she is going pee pee on the potty regularly (she'll be 3 in March). She occassionally asked for her diapers and I reminded her that we gave them to Liza. That seems to make her feel good.

Poo has been our battle and still is. We've had a total of 2 poos in the potty. Most days she will wait until whoever's watchign her is doing something or not looking, then run off to her room and hide in the corner to poo. If you ask her if she has to go, even if you know thats what she's doign, she'll lie and say no. I try not to let her go off and hide and if I catch her hiding before she starts to go, I usually try to convince her to go on the potty but most days she freaks out and has a tantrum over it so I put a pull up on her so I don't make myself barf scraping poo out of her panties. The two times she has gone poo, she has done it all by herself. Not a word to anyone, she just goes in the bathroom and does it. The first time she didn't tell us at all and I didnt see it until later that night. The second time was this past weekend and she came running out of the bathroom saying, "mommy I pooped I pooped!" We make a very big deal out of it and she gets special fruit snacks which is a treat for her. So I'm convinced that she will go consistently when she's ready, but I also know that taking away diapers is key. We use pull ups at night and if I dont change it right away she will go in it because she knows she can.

Good luck and KUP!
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Old 12-22-2009, 11:55 AM   #7
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Re: Potty Learning?

Ok, so here is my question. My DD is 3.4 years as well. She is in undewear full time during the day, even nap time. Night she is in a diaper. She pees in the potty most of the time. We and her childcare provider (2 days a week) set a timer to reminder her to use the potty, otherwise she gets really distracted and has an accident because she is engrossed in her work. Poop on the other hand - well she won't do that in the potty. She has gone a few times with much hilarity, was rewarded instantly with stickers and even ice cream, but for the most part waits until the night to poop in her diaper. We tried going without, but she woke up soaked in pee, just slept right through (oh the irony as she historically hasn't been a great sleeper).

What do I do with that? I think I might be willing to wake her in the night to go pee to help avoid accidents at night, but I also have a 3 month old. He sleeps alright and after a hard go with my DD with sleep, I'm living it up that I can have an infant and not look like I have two black eyes from lack of sleep!
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