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Old 01-21-2010, 12:59 PM   #1
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Still wakes at night at 2 - also Ditching the bottle? HELP ME PLEASE!

Ok, I know a lot of you breast fed for as long as you could...and I did so with my son until after a year old. But he was so hungry all the time, I had to give him bottles because I just couldn't keep up with demand and he would never sleep through the night.

Now he just turned two.

We managed to ditch the paci months ago but not the bottle.
For a while he only drank water in a bottle and his paci for backup, then we got rid of the bottle but not the paci. Paci went next but bottle came back and with milk. There are a variety of trials that went on with him for various reasons...but anyhow the point is right now he takes a bottle of milk for nap and bedtime....otherwise he screams and won't go to bed.

We have fought him to sleep at nap time with no bottle.
He gets tired and eventually gives up after a huge struggle.
I shouldn't have to do this every day.
All he wants is the stupid bottle.
He refuses the sippy for bed....drinks it all day but not for bed.
He outright says "no" and arches and tantrums at my audacity of presenting him with a sippy, regardless of what is in it.

I would totally let him cry it out...only today that didn't work for naptime, because my older one came looking for me right as he was about to fall asleep..."MOMMY! MOOOOMMYYYYYYY WHERE ARE YOOOOOU!"

Again, at night...he's a total angel getting in bed and happy to be good so long as he gets a bottle. But if there is no bottle...he cries. Again, I don't have a problem having him CIO because I know he's just spoiled and not hurt.....BUT....he shares a room with his soon to be 4 year old sister. So he has remained spoiled so that the poor girl can get herself to sleep...(she gives me problems too, wanting me to sleep with her and whatnot, or that it's too dark, or that she needs 23462342 stuffed animals, 3 of them must have a blanket to keep them warm, etc etc excuses to keep me in the room.)

But aside from the bottle...my biggest complaint is that after TWO YEARS of my son being alive....there have only been a handful of times where he has slept through the night. He still wakes up crying at random times like 1:30am and 4:30am right when I'm in REM sleep. I am exhausted and haggardy. I can only speculate that he doesn't like being wet from peeing and wakes up (and I use sposies now). I change him but it may or may not be enough and he may require a bottle to get back to sleep. And I give in because I'm SO FREAKING TIRED. When he had a binky and didn't have a bottle for bed, I think he slept more nights through leading me to believe it's the pee. But here again, I can't remember now.

So....I want him off the bottle but I don't want to bring back the paci to do it.
What do I do?

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Old 01-21-2010, 01:21 PM   #2
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Re: Ditching the bottle at 2....HELP ME PLEASE!

I personally would gradually wean it from him by putting less & less in it over the period of a week or two. That was how I night weened my overnight feedings when my son turned 1. I did it less & less lengthy over a month. Good for him, good for me.
It seems less traumatic for us both
I don't do anything cold turkey but I'm certain that is an option also.
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Old 01-21-2010, 01:57 PM   #3
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Re: Ditching the bottle at 2....HELP ME PLEASE!

I'm in the same boat mama. My DD just made 2 and she still takes a bottle for naps and bedtime and she has one in the middle of the night. She slept through the night maybe a total of 2 months.
I managed to get her off milk in the middle of the night with water in a bottle but that quickly ended when she started getting her eye teeth and molars all at the same time. Then we moved between my parents house, my in-laws and then to our own place, with all the moving I couldnt bear to take away her bottle.
Now shes settled and fine, I plan to take it away sometime soon. I keep telling her shes 2 now, so shes a big girl and big girls drink from a cup.
I tell her big girls dont wear diapers too but she seems more accepting of the cup thing
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Old 01-21-2010, 02:14 PM   #4
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Re: Ditching the bottle at 2....HELP ME PLEASE!

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Originally Posted by corinne76 View Post
I'm in the same boat mama. My DD just made 2 and she still takes a bottle for naps and bedtime and she has one in the middle of the night. She slept through the night maybe a total of 2 months.
I managed to get her off milk in the middle of the night with water in a bottle but that quickly ended when she started getting her eye teeth and molars all at the same time. Then we moved between my parents house, my in-laws and then to our own place, with all the moving I couldnt bear to take away her bottle.
Now shes settled and fine, I plan to take it away sometime soon. I keep telling her shes 2 now, so shes a big girl and big girls drink from a cup.
I tell her big girls dont wear diapers too but she seems more accepting of the cup thing
Ah yeah...there is a communication issue with us, I think too.
My son says a limited number of words and mostly talks gibberish which makes me take for grantedd his age and intelligence. I keep thinking he understands less and so I don't say too much in complete sentences. His friend who is less than a month younger (almost 2 now) is saying a lot of words and communicating more that way. I wonder if I'm not "discussing" things enough with him because I assume he won't understand what I'm saying...you'd think I'd know this already with a 4 year old but she spoke a lot sooner than he does.
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Old 01-21-2010, 02:14 PM   #5
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Re: Ditching the bottle at 2....HELP ME PLEASE!

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Originally Posted by nakedbabytoes View Post
I personally would gradually wean it from him by putting less & less in it over the period of a week or two. That was how I night weened my overnight feedings when my son turned 1. I did it less & less lengthy over a month. Good for him, good for me.
It seems less traumatic for us both
I don't do anything cold turkey but I'm certain that is an option also.
When I weaned my ds, I just couldn't handle it anymore (hopefully no one yells at me ) I just took one nursing session away each week. So I think that putting less milk in the bottle would work pretty good.

Oh and your ds is NOT spoiled for having a bottle at 2.
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Old 01-21-2010, 02:15 PM   #6
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Re: Ditching the bottle at 2....HELP ME PLEASE!

LOL oh yeah, but he likes to pee pee on the potty....so I know he's not totally in outer space!
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Old 01-21-2010, 02:17 PM   #7
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Re: Ditching the bottle at 2....HELP ME PLEASE!

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Originally Posted by cassieJJ View Post
When I weaned my ds, I just couldn't handle it anymore (hopefully no one yells at me ) I just took one nursing session away each week. So I think that putting less milk in the bottle would work pretty good.

Oh and your ds is NOT spoiled for having a bottle at 2.
Thanks for that....I worry that I am not "sticking to my guns" enough with him since he's the baby.

I think I'm going to try and tackle the sleep problem before taking away the bottle and in the meantime give him less and less to drink. It's just hard to tell what is causing him to wake up every night. Every now and then he sleeps through the whole night and I have no idea what changed. Go figure 50% of those nights he does sleep all night the 4 year old gets up with a nightmare or something.... I just can't win!
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Old 01-21-2010, 03:29 PM   #8
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Re: Ditching the bottle at 2....HELP ME PLEASE!

My advice is not to change him in the middle of the night and NOT to give him a bottle in the middle of the night. Once these are accomplished then work on either nap OR bedtime bottle. Nap might be easier for your sanity. Once that is gone for a week or two solid then take it away some at bedtime. Have him watch you throw the bottles out if you have to. Then he knows he can't get them again. I would also go to a straw cup for all sippys and call it big boy cup but that is just me.
FWIW, I am still nursing my 2 1/2 year old, but I have not nursed her during the night unless she was sick for well over a year, she knows how to go back to sleep on her own. I also haven't done a night diaper change unless she was poopy since she was 8 weeks old.
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Old 01-21-2010, 03:30 PM   #9
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Re: Ditching the bottle at 2....HELP ME PLEASE!

Fwiw, the bottle before bed is probably contributing to the wet in the middle of the night problem. Solve one, you'll probably solve the other.
Remember a few things:
Toddlers will try you at anything, and they need to know where the limit is. So whatever you decide to do, do it and stick with it. It will be hard, but it's worth it.
I don't have any specific advice for you other than that. My two year old has been off the bottle since nine months, but he does this with other things.
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Old 01-24-2010, 10:01 PM   #10
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Re: Ditching the bottle at 2....HELP ME PLEASE!

I don't know about this bottle business....he just won't sleep.
And tonight he was slithering out of the bed just now around 11:30pm. (I found him UNDER HIS BED when he woke up crying and stuck at naptime today!!!!!) I don't know what is waking him up. Of course by the time I got in there after my husband he had a wet diaper, but you can't do ANYTHING with him, like change him or put him back in bed, except MAYBE being held in a hug without him arching and flailing and screaming, all while mostly still asleep until he gets that bottle. As soon as he had it, he calmed down...and he didn't even put it in his mouth right away, he just held it. Then I could change his diaper. Then he was fine in the bed. Then he started drinking it....although I was mad because DH went to get it while I was holding him and hi filled it to the BRIM....ugh so much for giving less...

He woke up my daughter during all of this craziness. I feel like I'm stuck giving him bottles...why won't he sleep??!?! If I don't give it to him he will freak out for who knows how long. Screaming and crying and onto the floor....and I don't like this new thing about trying to be under things. He played under their little toddler table reading books today....he even tried to get under the tv console...I don't know WHAT this kid is thinking....he's 2 now!

2 years and not sleeping....it's not fair
I've even been taking them to the park after lunch to get exercise then down for nap. But he naps for so long...3 hours usually SOMETIMES 4. I don't know how to fix this....getting a nap or not getting a nap, he still wakes up at night at random times.

He did sleep through the night Saturday night...but he was up all day with the birthday party and had no nap and we just wore him out I guess, putting him to bed at 6:30, a half hour earlier than usual....and yes with a bottle. Sigh.
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