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Old 01-28-2010, 10:52 PM   #11
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Re: So, this has been a question for ~5yrs...possible miscarriage?

Similar thing. I was young, thought the period was just really heavy because I hadn't had one in two months.. which was nomral for me to skip a month sometimes. I noticed it was "chunkier" than normal but just thought "Huh, that's odd."

Fast forward about 4 years (I was 24). DH and I were married, and I had a miscarriage (after having a BFP), and looking back, the heavy bleeding was the same as that "heavy period" from when I was 19.

So technically when it comes to medical history, my docs haven't counted it because it wasn't "officially" documented at the time.

But *I* know it was a MC. I honestly don't feel like I lost a baby, probably because I never realized I was pregnant. But I DO feel that the second one was a lost baby, and I will never forget about it. I still have little moments of sorrow. But 6 months later I got preggo with DS1, and he is just so funny and lively that I cannot imagine life with a different child..because had I carried that "first" baby to term I would have a different child than the one I have now.. and DS2 and this current pregnancy would be completely different children.

But no, you aren't abnormal to feel the loss of that baby at all. And for anyone to tell you differently, it's not their place to tell you how to feel.

It would be like someone trying to make ME feel guilty for not really having an emotional reaction to my first miscarriage, even though I didn't really REALIZE what it was until 4 years later, or that I still have little grief moments of loosing the pregnancy before Christian.

Sorry if this was a little rambly.

Hugs
God bless,
Michelle

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Old 01-29-2010, 10:02 AM   #12
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Re: So, this has been a question for ~5yrs...possible miscarriage?

If you took an EPT and it was +, you probably did miscarry. Whether you choose to report it or not on your medical history is up to you, I don't feel that it's significant in a medical capacity in any sort of way (unless it was your first and you were RH-, which isn't the case).

As for how you should feel... that's such an individual thing. A baby is a baby, no matter how small. If you feel you lost a baby, that's how you should feel. If you feel like it's not a big deal, and you don't want to greive at all, then don't. Feelings aren't a rational thing, and shouldn't be compared to others'... they just are what they are, without a right or wrong.

I hope you find peace with your situation
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Old 01-29-2010, 03:59 PM   #13
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Re: So, this has been a question for ~5yrs...possible miscarriage?

I had the same thing happen when B was a few months old. It was my first "period" after having her so the cramping and all the blood felt normal. Until I was at work and was doubled over in pain that I claimed "felt just like labor". A few hours later at my Aunt's house I went to the bathroom and pushed what felt like a huge blot clot out and it looked just like a little baby. Smaller than the palm of my hand and I could see the umbilical cord starting to appear. I called for DH and he came in and realized what had happened. I felt like I lost a baby that second, but didn't know I was pregnant to try to avoid losing her or him. The OB said I was about 6 weeks along so he confirmed it.

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Old 01-29-2010, 04:42 PM   #14
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Re: So, this has been a question for ~5yrs...possible miscarriage?

Wow hearing all these stories makes me want to cry. Just before I got preg with my 1st dd I miscarried twins. I was about 5wks when I had a pos hpt. I kept bleeding lightly and then one day I was at work and the bleeding became very heavy and and I had strong cramps. My dh took me to the ER and when I told them I was preg they took me back immediately and did a preg test. It came back pos still so they decided to do an ultrasound. When the doc came back in the room to tell me the results from the scan she said that both babies were still fine. I almost fell to the ground!! I didn't know there were two! She gave me a copy of the ultrasound as a keepsake. I went home and my dr wanted me to come in and see him in a week. So I went in and he did another ultrasound and said that he couldn't find any heartbeats. After that I went home and my body did as it needed to. The pain was soooo strong that my dh took me to the ER to get something for the pain. I was given an injection and went home. Had another ultrasound a week later to confirm that they were gone. This was one of the most emotionally painful experiences in my life! I wanted those babies and so happy to be preg after I had just gone thru the traumatic loss of my little brother and I felt my preg was a gift to show me that I really had a reason to be happy in life still. After loosing them I felt such pain that I went into a deep depression. I lost my twins in July and by Oct I was preg again and now I have my beautiful dd! If i hadn't lost those babies I wouldn't have A'kylea and I could never imagine my life without her in it!! I have learned that everything happens for a reason, even if we don't understand what that reason is.
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Old 01-29-2010, 06:43 PM   #15
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Re: So, this has been a question for ~5yrs...possible miscarriage?

Don't feel bad momma! I think any type of miscarriage is horrible and sad, and of course later ones I think are probably more painful than earlier ones although I have never had a late one. Anyways, I also have had 2 m/c that I didn't report to doc. and I also feel bad to tell my docs. when asked about medical history. But I got a BFP with both of them and like a wk. later started heavily bleeding with severe cramps, and obviously wasn't preg. anymore after that...so I know they were m/c whether a doc. confirmed them or not! So grieving is perfectly normal, an saying you have had m/c when you know your body better than anyone else, is perfectly fine!
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Old 02-01-2010, 01:33 PM   #16
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Re: So, this has been a question for ~5yrs...possible miscarriage?


Thanks again, ladies
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Old 02-01-2010, 03:52 PM   #17
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Re: So, this has been a question for ~5yrs...possible miscarriage?

Quote:
Originally Posted by momof_2girls View Post
Wow hearing all these stories makes me want to cry. Just before I got preg with my 1st dd I miscarried twins. I was about 5wks when I had a pos hpt. I kept bleeding lightly and then one day I was at work and the bleeding became very heavy and and I had strong cramps. My dh took me to the ER and when I told them I was preg they took me back immediately and did a preg test. It came back pos still so they decided to do an ultrasound. When the doc came back in the room to tell me the results from the scan she said that both babies were still fine. I almost fell to the ground!! I didn't know there were two! She gave me a copy of the ultrasound as a keepsake. I went home and my dr wanted me to come in and see him in a week. So I went in and he did another ultrasound and said that he couldn't find any heartbeats. After that I went home and my body did as it needed to. The pain was soooo strong that my dh took me to the ER to get something for the pain. I was given an injection and went home. Had another ultrasound a week later to confirm that they were gone. This was one of the most emotionally painful experiences in my life! I wanted those babies and so happy to be preg after I had just gone thru the traumatic loss of my little brother and I felt my preg was a gift to show me that I really had a reason to be happy in life still. After loosing them I felt such pain that I went into a deep depression. I lost my twins in July and by Oct I was preg again and now I have my beautiful dd! If i hadn't lost those babies I wouldn't have A'kylea and I could never imagine my life without her in it!! I have learned that everything happens for a reason, even if we don't understand what that reason is.
Similar thing happened with me... Had bleeding at almost 10 weeks pregnant, went to the ER for an u/s and my baby was 'perfect' (doctor's words). Os was closed, bleeding had subsided, minimal cramping. Termed it a threatened miscarriage. The next day I lost my baby. I felt so empty... 1 cycle later (literally 4 weeks to the day after the miscarriage), we were pregnant again with my now 18 month old son, Finnegan. I still greive the loss of the baby that went to heaven, but am so very thankful for my beautiful and wonderful living son
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