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Old 05-27-2006, 04:35 PM   #21
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Re: Are you done having kids?

Glad to hear others are int he same boat as I am. I am 28 and preggers with #3, dh is nearly 36. He insists we are done but I really want one more, of course that is what I said before I was preggers with this one. I had my son when I was 16 and while most think that is far to young it was perfect for me. #2 came 7 1/2 years later after being told we would never concieve again (big surprise with that BFP). That was a horrid pregnancy so I sold every last baby item and swore it was my last, dh agreed. Then when dd was 2 I got baby fever and told him we were trying for #3 and I promised it would be the last. Here I am 26 weeks pregnant and dying to have #4 (ds is 11, dd is 3 3/4) . Dh insists he is having a vasectomy the second we are sure the baby is happy and healthy (we had a huge scare with dd). Thankfully he is a procrastinater and I hope he will put it off as he does everything else. I like my large age gaps but if I can squeeze #4 in there before he gets snipped I will deal with 2 kids close in age. I am also upset that I only got to name our son, he picked both girls names and I really wanted to pick this one's middle name. I feel like if I don't have any more babies the name I love won't get used (James for a boy, Jaymes for a girl) and that upset sme even more. Okay after all the I guess the answer is no we are not done (if I can help it).

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Old 05-27-2006, 05:29 PM   #22
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Re: Are you done having kids?

I hope not.
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Old 05-27-2006, 05:37 PM   #23
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Re: Are you done having kids?

dh is done, i would like more, but it took me forever to ttc david so im veeery grateful of what ive got so idont fret on what i could have kwim?
financially it can be a strain so i gotta be realistic in that aspect too. i already saving for david's college and i opened up a educational IRA for his private shcools.
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Old 05-27-2006, 06:24 PM   #24
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Re: Are you done having kids?

I should add, I am 29 (30 in oct) & dh is 31 in June. We've been married since a week after I turned 21, had dd #1 a week after our 1st anniversary, dd#2 when I was 24.5, dd #3 when I was 28. So at almost 30....I definately think I have a bit more time for a #4....its just HOW to convince dh! I would like another when dd#3 is 2.5-3 but I think that timeline falls right into when I'd be finishing my Masters so that wouldnt be good, I had a heck of a time getting & staying pg the last time. Somedays I cant imagine never ttc & being pg, childbirth & a newborn, even the waking every hour! Then somedays I think I MUST be insane to have 3 kids, LOL!! My mom is sure we'll have another someday, she has 4, my gma (her mom) had 4, my dad has 6, his mom had 7.....so most of the family does at LEAST 2 kids usually 3+ all before they are 30.
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Old 05-27-2006, 07:09 PM   #25
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Re: Are you done having kids?



oopss..somebody kicked the keyboard while mommy was still typing....

see actual post below
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Old 05-27-2006, 07:11 PM   #26
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Re: Are you done having kids?

We're done..We're both 27..the kiddies are 9, 6, and 10 months old....dh had a vasectomy in December...and on one hand I'm glad, because I know that financially we can't handle another one, but on the other hand I LOVE BEING PREGNANT, and I even had a good labor and delivery with Gracie. I often think about being a surrogate, but I don't think I could emotionally detach myself from the little one. (NOT saying that surrogate's are emotionally detached, just saying that I'm not strong enough to do that. I think surrogate's are wonderful)
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Old 05-27-2006, 07:26 PM   #27
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Re: Are you done having kids?

I am not sure what is in store for us. I think 2 is perfect (even though ds isnt here yet LOL) but part of me thinks that I will miss having a baby around when they grow or being preggo. Who knows, we will leave that in someone elses hands
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Old 05-27-2006, 07:27 PM   #28
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Re: Are you done having kids?

Some days yes and some days no!! DH's upcoming deployment is actually one of the reasons I am saying no. Kyla is almost 9 months and if DH wasn't going away in Feb, we would be TTC right now, but we tend to get preggo right away and then I would have the baby right after he left and then be alone with 3 kiddies!! We have thought about TTC right before he leaves, but I dont want another August baby, so we would have to get preggo the month before he leaves, which doesn't give us a whole lot of trying room, and that would be the one time we didn't get preg right away. Then I have thought about TTC on his leave while overseas, but who knows where I will be in my cycle then, and he will be getting home right around Kyla's 2nd birthday and by then I might be thinking that she is growing up, do I really want to go back to waking up every 2 hours again?? So it is very complicated!!!

Someone make up my mind for me so I can quit going crazy!!!!!
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Old 05-27-2006, 07:28 PM   #29
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Re: Are you done having kids?

it's neat to hear how most of you mamas started out having babies young and are so sucessful !!! I have my first when I was 18 and the second one when I was 22. I always dreamed of having a big family .. I love having kids ... We would liek to have 4 total but my last preg and delivery were a nightmare !!!! youngest ds is 7 mos old and we have talked about ttc #3 (maybe a girly) We would like to be due in april so we'll have one in June , one in Oct and the next one in april .. we'll see .. and then some days I also feel so overwhelmed and I think our first baby was sooo easy what was i thinking .. but I love the whole process even at times when I'm going crazy .. lol
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Old 05-27-2006, 07:49 PM   #30
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Re: Are you done having kids?

We're probably done.

I'm 35, DH is 32. We have a perfect little girl that took us 2+ years to conceive, so obviously my body isn't really that good at doing this anymore. She was also born with a dimple at the base of her spine where it was obviously a narrow miss for spinal bifida, and that scares the CRAP outta me when I think about having another. Of course I wasn't taking any folic acid because I was on ovulation suppressing drugs to begin a second round of IVF, so I was 6 weeks PG before I even knew I was PG ... but still, it scares me.

I also don't know if I want to go through all the sleep deprivation and stress of the first few months while I'm trying to be this awesome mommy to Isabel. I don't want her to stop going to playdates and stuff, even for a few weeks, while I try to cope with a newborn. I don't want her to have to sacrifice anything if I were to have another, and there's just no way for it *not* to cost her in terms of my time and my attention. She's just an awesome baby girl, and I know that a large part of that is just her being awesome, but there's a good dose of my mommying thrown in and I don't want that to change.

If I were younger, I'd be singing a different tune. But I'm old and the simple truth is that the longer I wait to get PG, the greater the risk of the baby not being well, and that would be totally unfair to Isabel, too, if I had to take even more time away from her to care for a child with special needs. (Man, I hope that just reads as my own concern/selfishness on Isabel's behalf and not as anything offensive to the wonderful mommies who *do* care for special needs kids.) If I felt comfortable waiting another 2-3 years before TTC again, that would be one thing. But I feel like I really would need to be TTC now and I'm just not willing to give up my life with Isabel to do that.

I'm also not willing to give up much more of my life with DH. The way we parent means we've pretty much put Isabel's needs first and foremost - she's still BFing a million times a day; she sleeps in our room, and when she wakes at night, she spends the rest of the night in bed with us; because we've never been really loud, nighttimes here are pretty silent, and we have to tiptoe around in our room when we go to bed. It all gets old. DH misses my boobs, I miss being able to take a long hot bath in my room at night, we miss being able to just talk when we go to bed, and we definitely miss having sex in our bed If we had another anytime soon, we'd probably go 3-4 years without just being able to go to our room, talk as we get ready for bed and go to bed and be able to get in a little spontaneous nookie. I don't want to do that!

But I still catch myself feelin' a little baby fever now and then. It's crazy.
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