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Old 03-03-2010, 01:16 PM   #1
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gobybike
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Need advice about 16 month old!

Alright, my DD is seriously driving me insane. She has always had a mind of her own (ever since I was pregnant!)But recently shes become stubborn and moody- but as always, can charm the toughest of soul...when she wants to. She is great when we go out in public or when we go to other peoples' homes, but it's like her happy-go-lucky attitude while we're out, completely vanishes the second we walk in our front door.

She recently started throwing tantrums that are over the top (for her, anyway). She throws herself backward- hitting her head on anything that happens to be near her, she is wild and crazy (which is fine!) but she runs over to me (usually when we're playing on the floor or reading) and with a huge smile on her face, acting as if she's going to give me loves, will come up and hit me, or smack her head into my shoulder/face/chest/whatever is closest. It always takes me by surprise- but then I will tell her "Eedan that's a no-no, we don't hurt mama." (I repeat this hundreds of times during the day!) and she shakes her head no and will usually either hug me or cuddle in my lap for a minute, giving off the vibe that she's sorry about it. However, she does this a lot during the day, and even after her papa get's home- she'll do it to him too! I stay at home with her and am starting to wish that my sweetheart and I could switch roles for awhile and let me go to work!

Gahhh!

Another thing- she knows the basic rules of the house (most of the time) and will actually give herself away by repeating "no.no.no.no." when doing something- but the biggest thing this week is messing with the t.v. and the computer, both of which are in the same room. And I swear she messes with them just to get a rise out of me! Because she will alert me "mama!! mama!!" while running to the t.v. or computer and will laugh as she's watching me scramble to the area of the room that she is heading and I will tell her "no, no Eedan. We don't touch the computer (or t.v.)." but she'll run over there and slap the keyboard or push buttons on the t.v. all the while giggling and exaggerating her excitement. And what feels like thousands of times during the day I am trying to distract her with something else, removing her from the living room, getting her attention focused on something else- but no more then a minute later she is off messing with the computer again.

I just don't get it. She's a healthy vegetarian (isn't allowed sugar), she's a great nap taker and sleeps well at night, she's a little rough when she plays (her newest favorite game is putting her dolls in her little dump trucks and running them off the couch ) but overall she's happy and healthy. So I don't get it. Is this something that most kids do? Is it in a toddlers agenda to shake their parents' nerves till they explode?! Or is my DD just a odd crazy child out to drive me out of my mind??

Help, anyone?

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Old 03-03-2010, 02:01 PM   #2
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Re: Need advice about 16 month old!

Sorry to tell you but it sounds pretty normal to me. DS is 15 months and can do this type of thing too. He doesn't have huge tantrums but he will scream and throw his head back when he can't get what he wants. She's probably either bored or needing more attention. The best thing that works for DS is to take him outside. He just wanders around and I follow him to make sure he doesn't get hurt, but I let him lead. Usually he will just wander around checking things out. I know it sucks at this time of year, but just bundle up. DS behaves SO much better when he's had some outside time each day.
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Old 03-03-2010, 02:32 PM   #3
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Re: Need advice about 16 month old!

It is all about repetition at that age and what she is doing is normal. However, now that she is getting closer to 18 months, you might consider a stronger action instead of just redirection. If one of my girls or daycare kids is constantly being too rough with me, I tell them no and then move away from them. They do not get attention for being rough. They are shown the right way to act. You might be sending the wrong message to you daughter by sitting there and after saying no, then cuddling. If she is wanting attention, she is certainly getting it and not really getting anything major for consistently being too aggressive with mom. This might sound harsh for some parents but I do not allow kids to hit me, etc. Eventually they usually start treating other kids or animals this way and that is definitely not okay. I am not saying she is doing these actions with bad intentions, she might really think it is fun and an okay way to play. It is up to you to teach her otherwise. I also give timeouts starting at this age. There is no time limit, it is more about taking them away from the situation and they can come back to play whenever they are ready to follow the rules. Sometimes take 10 seconds, sometimes a few minutes.
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Old 03-03-2010, 10:02 PM   #4
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Re: Need advice about 16 month old!

She does listen better when we're outside, and we take a morning walk and an afternoon walk and frequently visit the park down the street- but the second we are home she is ready to go wild. I'm glad to hear DD isn't the only one who throws tantrums like that!
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