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Old 03-22-2010, 06:44 PM   #1
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Lying...

Ok. My DD is 6. and she is LYING about everything! Even when i watch her do something. I just dont understand.

Is there a reason for this? Is there a way i can put an end to it?

Any advise is helpful

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Old 03-22-2010, 06:52 PM   #2
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Re: Lying...

Sounds like she is right on track developmentally
It's just a phase and most kids go through it at about that age. Just remind her that she is lying, how you feel about lying, consequences for lying vs telling the truth, etc. It should pass or subside in a few months.
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Old 03-22-2010, 06:59 PM   #3
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Re: Lying...

My 5yo does some of this as well. I find it better to avoid direct confrontation as I think that while she knows she's lying - she's also so committed to it that it seems like truth to her. So usually, I correct her, and then refuse (as best I can) to engage in the conversation. I don't think that at that age it is worth punishing as the distinction between what is "true" and what is "I want it to be true therefore it is" is pretty thin.

FWIW my 5yo also brings random things home from daycare and claims they are hers, that "someone" gave them to her, etc. My mother reminds me that I used to stop at the laundromat on my way home from kindergarten (different times, then - I walked home alone) and beg strangers for candy from the vending machines I do sort of vaguely recall...
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Old 03-22-2010, 08:38 PM   #4
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Re: Lying...

I hope it passes soon.

Is whining part of this stage developmentally too?
and not listening, lol, The list can go on...
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Old 03-22-2010, 09:28 PM   #5
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Re: Lying...

my 6 year old has been doing this and its passing off on my 5 year old. drives me crazy!!
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Old 03-22-2010, 09:36 PM   #6
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Re: Lying...

My 5 year old (nearly 6) does this, too. The good news is it seems to be getting a little better. It used to be about everything under the sun, now it's only when he thinks he's going to get in trouble. We have strict rules about lying, he knows he's going to get caught, and he's recently experienced the pain of not being believed even when he is telling the truth because we can't trust him to tell the truth about some things. Most of the time I can head it off with acting like I know the truth, even if I don't. If he thinks I know the truth, he's a lot less likely to lie about it because he knows he'll be punished. And we always reiterate that most of the time he won't get in any trouble for telling the truth (just a warning to be more careful, don't do it again, etc), but if he lies about it then he's getting a full punishment, which is usually time on his bed or not attending an upcoming MOMS Club event. And afterward he's required to explain to us what happened, why he was punished, and what he's going to do differently next time, so we can make sure he's understanding the scenario surrounding the punishment. It's gradually getting better.
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Old 03-22-2010, 11:52 PM   #7
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Re: Lying...

I am having issues with my 5 year old too (well next week he will be 5)...It seems to be constant, but mostly when he knows that he has done something wrong. I figured it was a stage and that it would most likely pass...as the pp's have mentioned.
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Old 03-22-2010, 11:57 PM   #8
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Re: Lying...

Quote:
Originally Posted by jamieism View Post
I find it better to avoid direct confrontation as I think that while she knows she's lying - she's also so committed to it that it seems like truth to her. So usually, I correct her, and then refuse (as best I can) to engage in the conversation. I don't think that at that age it is worth punishing as the distinction between what is "true" and what is "I want it to be true therefore it is" is pretty thin.
Well said.

I find when dealing w/ my Pre-K fibbers it is best to stay on point. "I know that you did do XXX, and I don't like that you are saying XXXX." And if it is big, follow with a consequence.
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Old 03-23-2010, 11:19 AM   #9
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Re: Lying...

oh ashley, my ds is exactly the same! im loosing my mind!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 03-23-2010, 06:49 PM   #10
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Re: Lying...

my son is lying too and he is only 3.5! i cant stand it. with him, i have no idea how to get him to stop b/c hes young. anyone deal with this with a 3 year old??
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