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Old 04-09-2010, 02:06 PM   #11
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Re: Why I think cosleeping is rediculous!

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No offense to all you cosleeping familys out there. But IMO it is just as stupid and wreckless as not strapping your child into their carseat! You may go their whole lives without incident, but when incident happens, its deadly!

I was just informed, my cousin in California, her 2 month old daughter was found dead this morning. Her and her husband successfull coslept with their 3 year old son. But woke to their new baby girl suffocated.

Please pray for them, especially for cousin Abby, as she already has problems (long time eating disorder, which is under control, and social anxiety problems).

I pray for those of you who choose to cosleep, atleast, get a cosleeper bed thing, so the baby is safe, close, but far enough away from getting smothered.
Wow, that is a major shame. How sad.

But cosleeping is safe. More babies die in cribs each year than in cosleeping situations and almost all babies who die in cosleeping situations were in situations where cosleeping safety rules were not followed. I feel bad for your family but they must have done something wrong. Perhaps she was taking medication that made her too sleepy to realize she had rolled over on the baby? Or did the baby roll under a pillow? Both major no nos in cosleeping. Suffocating in cosleeping happens because cosleeping safety rules are not being practiced. Very, very sad.

Personally, I think cribs are dangerous and I much prefer safe cosleeping. So, don't condemn cosleeping just because this happened. It is a real tragedy and deserves prayers but it does not mean that cosleeping is dangerous. And it is certainly much, much safer than driving in a car, with or without a car seat.

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Old 04-09-2010, 02:09 PM   #12
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Re: Why I think cosleeping is rediculous!

I am very sorry for this horrible tragedy that has happened within your family. I can't imagine the depth of pain your cousin and her husband, as well as the extended family, must be going through.

However; there is no need for you to come on here and attack good parents who make well informed decisions on cosleeping, or anything else, based on what is right for their family. Calling us "stupid, 'wreckless', and 'rediculous' " is just going to start a heated debate on the pros and cons of cosleeping and get feathers ruffled.

If you want support during this painful time, there are better ways to go about it. Don't start attacking people whom you do not know.

If you want to turn this into a cause that you are passionate about and wish to inform others of the facts on, learn them first.
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Old 04-09-2010, 02:11 PM   #13
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Re: Why I think cosleeping is rediculous!

I am so sorry for your family.

I, however, will continue to safely share a bed with my babies. Bed sharing is the norm in many, many other cultures and has been done safely centuries before our country and culture were even founded. Education is the key to freedom and like TwinKristi said it will not take away your sadness but it may help you understand that it can be done safely.
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Old 04-09-2010, 02:24 PM   #14
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Re: Why I think cosleeping is rediculous!

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I am very sorry for this horrible tragedy that has happened within your family. I can't imagine the depth of pain your cousin and her husband, as well as the extended family, must be going through.

However; there is no need for you to come on here and attack good parents who make well informed decisions on cosleeping, or anything else, based on what is right for their family. Calling us "stupid, 'wreckless', and 'rediculous' " is just going to start a heated debate on the pros and cons of cosleeping and get feathers ruffled.

If you want support during this painful time, there are better ways to go about it. Don't start attacking people whom you do not know.

If you want to turn this into a cause that you are passionate about and wish to inform others of the facts on, learn them first.
Thank you for your sympathy

But (trying to NOT turn this into some debate)

I did note in the beginning, to all the cosleeping parents, please do not take offense. I stated my opinion on the situation. If you took offense, then thats your issue. I think cosleeping is "stupid" "wreckless" "rediculous", I never said the parents were. That is totally your and all parents decision. I personally do not think its a good idea.

So, if I were to say, parents who feed their children carrots, please dont take offense. Carrots are dangerous! And its stupid to feed them to your kids (note that this is totaly made up) Would you take offense because I think giving carrots to your kids is stupid?

No, Im not trying to argue who is offended, just trying to explain, I did not post this to piss cosleepers off. I have never thought it was a good idea, and right now, at this moment, Im sad, mad and greiving. So I am stating why I dont like it.

If you want to post how crib sleeping is bad, and your friends baby died in a crib, thats fine, Im sorry for your friend. But i wont be offended because you think cribs are horrible.

Thanks again for your sympathy to my cousin and her family, and I hope you are unoffended
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Old 04-09-2010, 02:37 PM   #15
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Re: Why I think cosleeping is rediculous!

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Thank you for your sympathy

But (trying to NOT turn this into some debate)

I did note in the beginning, to all the cosleeping parents, please do not take offense. I stated my opinion on the situation. If you took offense, then thats your issue. I think cosleeping is "stupid" "wreckless" "rediculous", I never said the parents were. That is totally your and all parents decision. I personally do not think its a good idea.

So, if I were to say, parents who feed their children carrots, please dont take offense. Carrots are dangerous! And its stupid to feed them to your kids (note that this is totaly made up) Would you take offense because I think giving carrots to your kids is stupid?

No, Im not trying to argue who is offended, just trying to explain, I did not post this to piss cosleepers off. I have never thought it was a good idea, and right now, at this moment, Im sad, mad and greiving. So I am stating why I dont like it.

If you want to post how crib sleeping is bad, and your friends baby died in a crib, thats fine, Im sorry for your friend. But i wont be offended because you think cribs are horrible.

Thanks again for your sympathy to my cousin and her family, and I hope you are unoffended
Well don't take offense to this, but I think you're stupid. Does it really make it any better that I said that first?? No! And I don't really think you're stupid, I think you're deep in grief right now and are saddened by something that could have been prevented. The loss of an infant is always incredibly sad. But to say "a choice" that a parent makes is stupid, reckless and rediculous, when you know very little about it, will only cause problems on here. Prefacing it with "don't take offense to this" really accomplishes nothing as you can see.
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Old 04-09-2010, 03:31 PM   #16
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Re: Why I think cosleeping is rediculous!

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Originally Posted by corrielainedd View Post
Thank you for your sympathy

But (trying to NOT turn this into some debate)

I did note in the beginning, to all the cosleeping parents, please do not take offense. I stated my opinion on the situation. If you took offense, then thats your issue. I think cosleeping is "stupid" "wreckless" "rediculous", I never said the parents were. That is totally your and all parents decision. I personally do not think its a good idea.
Any time you (collective you) start a sentence with "No Offence" or "please don't take offence" you know darn well people are going to be offended. It's like a disclaimer that now you are going to say something that will offend many people. It's like saying "I don't mean to be rude but..." Actually...ya you are meaning to be rude (again collective you)

While I am very sad for the loss, no mother deserves to have to go through life without one of her children, you have no way of knowing if it was a direct result of co sleeping, she could have placed the baby in a crib and woken up to the exact same thing.

Far more children co sleep around the world than crib (bassinet, playpen) sleep yet far more children die in cribs (bassinet, playpens)from whatever....sids, faulty cribs (have you seen all the crib recalls this past year....literally MILLIONS of cribs were recalled because they broke and babies hung themselves. by falling through the drop side after it detatched from the crib.

Millions and millions of children co sleep without issue....far more than crib sleep.

SIDS is mysterious and you never know when an infant will die from it. Until an autopsy is done you will not know what the cause of death was. She could have had a heart defect, it could have been sids, she could have suffocated....you just don't know. Even after an autopsy it is likely that the findings will be inconclusive.....that's part of the big mystery of sids.

Again, I am very sorry that your cousin has to go through this....I really am.
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Old 04-09-2010, 05:23 PM   #17
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Re: never mind

I'm so very sorry for your cousins loss...I hope she is able to grieve the loss of her precious daughter without being made to feel like a murderer. How horrifying.

FTR, my aunt died IN A CRIB almost 41 years ago at the age of 9 months...I wouldn't call my grandma negligent or ignorant for putting my aunt in a crib..
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Old 04-09-2010, 11:06 PM   #18
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Re: never mind

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I'm so very sorry for your cousins loss...I hope she is able to grieve the loss of her precious daughter without being made to feel like a murderer. How horrifying.

FTR, my aunt died IN A CRIB almost 41 years ago at the age of 9 months...I wouldn't call my grandma negligent or ignorant for putting my aunt in a crib..
Oh that is a good point about the cousin. Poor woman! She must feel so responsible! I hope she can move past it.
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Old 04-09-2010, 11:53 PM   #19
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Re: Why I think cosleeping is rediculous!

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Originally Posted by Chey View Post
Any time you (collective you) start a sentence with "No Offence" or "please don't take offence" you know darn well people are going to be offended. It's like a disclaimer that now you are going to say something that will offend many people. It's like saying "I don't mean to be rude but..." Actually...ya you are meaning to be rude (again collective you)

While I am very sad for the loss, no mother deserves to have to go through life without one of her children, you have no way of knowing if it was a direct result of co sleeping, she could have placed the baby in a crib and woken up to the exact same thing.

Far more children co sleep around the world than crib (bassinet, playpen) sleep yet far more children die in cribs (bassinet, playpens)from whatever....sids, faulty cribs (have you seen all the crib recalls this past year....literally MILLIONS of cribs were recalled because they broke and babies hung themselves. by falling through the drop side after it detatched from the crib.

Millions and millions of children co sleep without issue....far more than crib sleep.

SIDS is mysterious and you never know when an infant will die from it. Until an autopsy is done you will not know what the cause of death was. She could have had a heart defect, it could have been sids, she could have suffocated....you just don't know. Even after an autopsy it is likely that the findings will be inconclusive.....that's part of the big mystery of sids.

Again, I am very sorry that your cousin has to go through this....I really am.
There is a girl in my baby loss 'club' that had her child die SEVERAL years ago because of a malfunctioning crib and has been trying to get it off the market but it is still there still killing babies!!
My son died in my bed too but the autopsy proved it was NOT suffocation.

To the OP you have the right to your opinion but i certainly hope you can keep it to yourself as far as your cousin and other family members go. Losing a child is so hard and her fault or not she will likely blame herself anyways, and she won't need any help with that. I am so sorry for your families loss.
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Old 04-14-2010, 03:01 PM   #20
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Re: Why I think cosleeping is rediculous!

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There is a girl in my baby loss 'club' that had her child die SEVERAL years ago because of a malfunctioning crib and has been trying to get it off the market but it is still there still killing babies!!
My son died in my bed too but the autopsy proved it was NOT suffocation.

To the OP you have the right to your opinion but i certainly hope you can keep it to yourself as far as your cousin and other family members go. Losing a child is so hard and her fault or not she will likely blame herself anyways, and she won't need any help with that. I am so sorry for your families loss.

I am so sorry for your loss mama, I read your sons webpage and I saw his beautiful picture. There's nothing I can say that will make anything better but I truly am so sorry
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