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Old 04-16-2010, 12:30 PM   #11
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zander's mama
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Re: No other place to post this.....

Originally Posted by Mommy2Gav View Post
Sounds like he is very angry. You mentioned that you haven't been getting along at all for the last 6 months yet you are 3 months pg with a planned baby. Are you sure he was on board to begin with? This DOES NOT in ANY way give him the right to suggest what he did, but could that be the source of his anger?
He claimed he was on board with it. He actually was the one who initiated trying now instead of later. We weren't really fighting around then, it was more bickering and just because he wasn't communitcating at all. I have him communicating better now, but my MIL made him close up like a clam (so to speak) throughout his life. That was the basis for the earlier irritations, and I guess the main root from now too. He has a habit of walking away and leaving things...he thinks if he leaves it alone, it'll get better and solve itself. I honestly think that's the main reason things are so bad.....nothing gets fully resolved....just pushed off until later.

Originally Posted by Sweet_Fantasy_Fox View Post
I think you should sit down and write him a letter, at the end ask him to write down what he feels/wants/needs and give it back to you. This way there is no way arguing can start up and you both will be calmand able to get everyhting out on the table to work things out.
I think this may be one of the best ways to try and resolve everything right now. As I said above, he likes to walk away from situations and just drop them. Then they only get cooled down and forgotten until the next time. It never gets worked through because he for some reason can't express what he feels and thinks anymore. And for us after the "i do's" the little spats did get worse. It wasn't until over a year after that things started looking gloomy though. Iím hoping itís just stress of everything thatís going on.

Originally Posted by Winter View Post
My nephews are allowed VERY little sugar. Guess what the oldest one wants the most in his life? Sugar. His mom always says "no, no, no sugar". He wants sugar more than anything! He is a FIEND for it now! If he were allowed a little in moderation each day or even every third day, it wouldn't be taboo. But since he is restricted to having it on very rare occasions he desires it that much more.
On a sunnier note....we do give DS sugar in moderation at home (the grandparents give him much more). He gets a little piece of chocolate out of his candy stash, a bowl of ice cream, a cookie or two for being good, etc....and he is still a fiend for it. Just yesterday he came walking in the kitchen while we were cooking just covered in chocolate (he found some chocolate eggs that we missed from one of his easter baskets) and then cried when I took the remaining ones away. I found out that he ate 3 of them before I took the rest. No special snack for him that night!

Thank you everyone for your advice and help. It's already made me feel better about the situation....and that we can make it through this.


Kendall...mommy to Z (2-20-08) , R (10-14-10) and loving wifey to C
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Old 05-09-2010, 08:22 PM   #12
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Re: No other place to post this.....

Hi1 What your husband said to you was very disrespectful and hopefully only out of anger. In the last days the enemy is here to seek, kill and destroy. Family is his # 1. This baby is nothing but a blessing from GOD. I hope you and your DH can sit down and talk and things will get better for you both. Raising a family can certainly put a strain on a marriage and it is certainly not easy. You are in my prayers!
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