Reply Hey Mom! Learn more about the Gerber Life Insurance Grow-Up Plan!
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-03-2010, 12:24 PM   #1
dkpuppets's Avatar
dkpuppets
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Utah
Posts: 129
daddy vs grandpa

due to lack of jobs and a new baby we've recently moved back in with my parents. my DH has been out of work since december and has basically spent that time facebooking, bowling, working out, and talking politics online with his friends. needless to say, I was greatly relieved when my dad took over all of the responsibilities that come with my nearly two year old that I can't do.

my hubby is constantly complaining about the way my dad is handling our daughter, but rarely takes any responsibility himself. "let her cry herself to sleep" "no junk food, she has to eat what we give her" "you're spoiling her" usually on his way out the door. he wants me to back him up and tell my dad not to rock her to sleep and don't let her "graze." but I am exhausted taking care of our 2 week old baby and am just glad someone is taking care of her.

anyway, I guess I'm just venting. because we've all hinted to DH that he needs to get off his butt and do something with his kids, but he does what he wants. he starts a new job next week and figures (I'm assuming) that it's too late to regain the bond with his daughter because she already prefers grandpa. but who can blame her? grandpa gets up with her when she cries at night, feeds her in the morning, and often puts her to bed. occasionally daddy will read her a story or play with her, but she knows that his computer takes precedence over all. it's sad really, but until he realizes he's the problem I'm not sure what to do.

Advertisement

__________________
mom to Grace and David wife to Erik puppet making SAHM
dkpuppets is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2010, 02:42 PM   #2
tallanvor
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 13,308
Re: daddy vs grandpa

There isn't anything you can do. Don't nag him. Not saying you do, just meant that you should guard against that. If he knows how you feel, don't keep bringing it up. Until he wants to do something about it, there isn't really anything to do.
tallanvor is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2010, 02:50 PM   #3
crunchymom2b's Avatar
crunchymom2b
Registered Users
seller
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Springfield, MA
Posts: 5,412
My Mood:
Re: daddy vs grandpa

You have to be honest with your DH and tell him the truth. I don't blame your DD for prefering Grandpa- I would to.

Just because he'll be working doesn't mean he can't bond with DD. They could spend an hour after work together. Something like that.

Just be up front. I hope he changes. *hugs*
__________________


Alycia + Tom = 2 Labor Day babies! Tommy (9/09) + Vinny (9/12)
Under construction: unexpectedly expecting in 2015!
crunchymom2b is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-03-2010, 02:57 PM   #4
ChicanaCoqueta's Avatar
ChicanaCoqueta
Registered Users
seller
seller
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: San Pancho
Posts: 1,837
My Mood:
Re: daddy vs grandpa

well I'm glad your father has stepped up to help. I'd hate to imagine how things would be if you didn't have your parents to help out.

this is an issue that def. warrants discussion between the 2 of you. he needs to help out
__________________
City-dwelling tree hugger Mama to Tlaloc, growing so fast (May '08)
Swagbucks Everybody's doing it
ChicanaCoqueta is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-27-2010, 06:26 PM   #5
dkpuppets's Avatar
dkpuppets
Registered Users
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Utah
Posts: 129
Re: daddy vs grandpa

UPDATE:
daddy has gone back to work. things have cooled down a little. he frequently puts her to bed. my little sister is home from college for the summer and sharing a room with my daughter so she takes the night shift a lot. grandpa still does a lot of her feedings but only because they usually happen the same time as little brother's feedings.
daddy still spends most of his leisure time on the phone or computer, but he's working now so I don't mind as much. we even started having family dinner every night. it's the first week and we've only had two meltdowns (my mom took over when it was my 14 year old brother's turn to cook). yay!
__________________
mom to Grace and David wife to Erik puppet making SAHM
dkpuppets is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Copyright 2005 - 2014 Escalate Media. All Rights Reserved.